BONES: An Essay on Shitty TV

We all have a few shows we watch that could be deemed ‘guilty pleasures,’ because they suck. Maybe we know they suck, but we still watch because of an actor we like. Or maybe the show used to be good, has run its course, and we can’t let go. Or maybe you don’t know it sucks cause I haven’t told you yet. That’s why we’re here now.

Before we move forward there is a pop-culture term called “Jumping the Shark” which refers to an episode of Happy Days where The Fonz literally jumped a shark on water skis. The idea is that when an event so monumentally stupid occurs on a show, said show can never recover. The show may continue on for years after, but it will never be able to regain the quality of product it produced prior. It is forever tarnished. I want you to know this because it will come up…

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Whatever Happened to Kevin Smith…

This is a question we could be asking a few years from now. That’s because the events of the weekend could very well destroy his career. Let me be clear, I’m a HUGE Smith fan and can’t wait till he comes back to Detroit to shoot Hit Somebody. And while I don’t think his career is in danger, I’ve been wrong before…

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Dr. Ndamukong: or How I learned to stop worrying & love a rookie…

So the Lions appear to have finally done something right. Last year’s 1st round pick, DT Ndamukong Suh exceeded even the loftiest of expectations. He plays old school, punch ’em in the mouth football. And the maturity he’s shown so far in his early career has been impressive to say the least.

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The 10 Best Seasons of Television of the Last 20 Years

So, continuing on my rant about TV, I have decided to compile a list of THE 10 BEST SEASONS OF TELEVISION (in my lifetime). This is not the best shows, but single seasons that rung loud and delivered a lasting effect.

These are single seasons, out of longer runs. So shows that only ran for one season (Firefly, Terriers, Freaks And Geeks) wont be included. This is more where shows hit their peaks and why… Some possible spoilers ahead.

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The American Television Viewer Makes Me Sick; CBS

CBS has a business model that works. Produce mindless, run of the mill, cookie cutter TV shows and dominate the ratings. The scripts are like those Mad-Lib books where you just fill in the nouns and what not.

The other sure-fire way to the heart of the American viewer is to take Has-Been, semi-celebs and make them do physical challenges, like dancing.

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Season (Series?) Finale of TERRIERS Tonight.

I fear for the worst. Despite my repeated e-mails to FX, it seems as though they may have already given up on Terriers.

During last night’s 90-minute season finale of Sons of Anarchy, which is sure to be FX’s highest rated show of the winter, they found time for only one Terriers ad. I saw no less than 7 commercials for the return of Archer, which is still more than a month away, but only one for Terriers which is on tonight.

 

I’ve suffered the cancellation of many of my favorite shows over the years. Terminator: Sarah Conner Chronicles, Freaks and Geek, Arrested Development, Firefly; to name a few. All canceled before their time, but none pained me as much as I expect this one to.

The only hope I hold onto now is the fact that FX hasn’t officially canned the show yet. At least not publicly. So anyhow, please watch tonight in hopes that high enough ratings for the finale convince them it’s worth another run…

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Conveyors of Common Sense…

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