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This episode of Femme Fatales started up like the female version of the Hangover, complete with a g-string, dead guy in the bed and a blow-up doll at the table. The main character Rachel (Jordan Madley) wakes up obviously hung over and panics finding the body. Who wouldn’t? From there the show takes on a flashback view on the events leading up to that morning, the story continuing after each flashback.

During the flashbacks we get to see how in love Rachel and her husband to be Cam are. She’d actually rather be with him and miss the bachelorette party. This is a classic difference between men and women, she may as well suggest they have a joint Bachelor/Bachelorette party.

After a nicely done bang-scene, Cam’s sister/Rachel’s maid of honor Kim (Tammy Felice) and her two friends Daphne (Kerry Knuppe) and Sharon (Arloa Reston) show up to whisk her off to a beach house where their little party will be. Rachel laments about how she hopes they didn’t get a stripper, but oh man is she soooooo wrong. Now before you think it’s weird that a guy thinks a stripper is a good thing, you’ll change your tune when he shows up because he’s frickin’ hilarious. Props to Jon Fleming who plays ‘Stripper Aaron’ and the writer of this episode, Richard Hollis.

After Lilith, as the house owner shows them around and leaves the party gets started. And might I just say that Tanit Phoenix was looking simply marvelous in the episode. But then again she does in every episode. Not only does the party start, but it straight up turns into a murder whodunit in this mutha! As they try to piece everything together from last night a lot of things come to light as the girls all begin to accuse one another for possibly strangling Aaron the Stripper. But let’s pause for a few awesome quotes from Aaron during the course of the episode.

“The Girls at the last party got a little too excited. And by too excited, I mean that they ripped my uniform because they couldn’t wait to suck my dick.”

“What’s under here? It might be a dick! Oooooooh it’s a dick behind door one!”

“I’m a tea bag robot. I’m from the future to tea bag the bachelorette!”

“You feel that? You’re waking the monster. I wanna have your mixed race baby.”

So let’s break this murder mystery down!

AND NOW OUR SUSPECTS

So the obvious choice would be Sharon, of course! Right? All signs point to it, with her past troubles and hobby of bashing her ex-boyfriend with a crowbar and being scorned and pool shoved by Aaron the scumbag stripper. Not to mention she threatened to kill him! But as much as I the viewer wanted to be right, the writers pull one out of left field and Rachel’s fiancée Cam shows up at the house to make sure Rachel is okay. Hopefully they can hide the body… but they fail. And Cam sees the stripper body just before he has a post-alcohol induced vomitorium in the sink.

After the puking has subsided they all stand outside debating what to do and Rachel decides to postpone the wedding so something can be done about the whole ‘dead body’ situation sitting in the beach house… probably getting a little ripe at this point. Cam however refuses and let’s loose a bombshell that changes everything about this little murder mystery.

He needs to get married before he is thirty. Ya see, his grandma left him an inheritance (10 MILLION!) in her will with the stipulation that he must get married before 30 years of age. This is based on how big of a schmuck Cam used to be when his granny was still alive. Too bad he picked after she died to screw up, because now he is totally committed to Rachel with the money being a distant second. Rachel then asks what would happen to the moola if he didn’t get married before thirty and all eyes focus on…..

KIM!

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN!

It turns out Kim, Cam’s sister was behind the whole thing. She wanted the ten million and created an elaborate plot to ruin Cam and Rachel’s wedding.

So, in Clue fashion,  it was –

Booyah! Even Aaron the stripper was in on it! Kim drugged Rachel so she wouldn’t remember fake banging the stripper as Kim recorded it on camera phone, even going so far as to make the moaning sounds for Rachel. Unfortunately for Aaron he thought he deserved more for the assistance that he gave Kim so she decided to dispose of him permanently. The douche got greedy. And crazy Kim gets hauled off to jail, promising to see them again and hoping they’ll save her some cake…. In your dreams crazy lady.

Overall, I loved the shit out of this episode. It was funny, intriguing, some good acting between all of the ladies, and four hot chicks after a night of bachelorette partying. And of course Tanit Phoenix who is in a league of her own.

I give the episode a 4 out of 5 bears, because there wasn’t a moment where I wasn’t thoroughly entertained. Favorite episode behind The White Flower.

Good job Femme Fatales!