Welcome to The Griz Bin, a weekly look at the wide world of comic related nonsense that we all know and love.
The X-Men Guide To Puberty: If you have to ask ‘how many penises is normal?’ this pamphlet is for you – [CollegeHumor]
The 6 Creepiest Comic Book Characters of All Time: Not creepy as in that weird guy is looking at you, more like this horse just fondled you and now wants cab fare – [Cracked]
Gorgeous Gwen & MJ Pin-Ups: I shouldn’t need to say anything else – [ComicsAlliance]
It looks like after much speculation and geek debate, Darth Maul will be returning to the Galaxy Far Far Away via the Clone Wars this season. After hinting towards his return at the end of the Savage Oppress story arc in Clone Wars Season 3, supervising director Dave Filoni confirmed recently over at Entertainment Weekly that Maul would be back in force with the full blessing of plaid clad billionaire George Lucas:
Filoni was as surprised as anyone during a Clone Wars story meeting when Star Wars creator George Lucas asked Filoni to figure out a way to bring Darth Maul back. He had introduced a similar warrior, the powerhouse Savage Oppress, in the third season of Clone Wars because of the lack of a Maul-type antagonist.
Oppress plays a major role in the return of his “long-lost brother,” Filoni says, and fans can expect Darth Maul to reignite his rivalry with Obi-Wan Kenobi, the Jedi Knight who cut him in half.
Filoni expects a strong reaction from fans, but he promises he didn’t bring back Darth Maul for a short-lived stunt.
“There’s a lot of ground that has not been covered as far as Darth Maul is concerned, so there’s a lot of room to grow with him,” Filoni says. “It’s all balanced with, ‘Boy, we’ve gotta make this really good because this is a really big deal.'”
And of course the official teaser for the return of the soft spoken horned Sith:
So what the hell, I guess if they can make this work then I’ll try my best to enjoy it. I was very skeptical and thought it verged on sacrilege when they announced Darth Maul’s brother would be showing up on the Clone Wars but I ended up enjoying the living crap out of that. The best episode of that season featured the best three way lightsaber fight I’ve seen. And with three dark side users no less….
Maul is just in time for the big 3D re-release of Episode 1: The Phantom Menace in 2012 and I’m sure that’s just around the time we’ll be getting the episodes he’ll be showing up in. The only questions I have are simple, the first one being the most irrelevant. Which planet is he supposedly exiled on? It’s somewhere in the Outer Rim according to Mother Talzin, and I’ll be a little let down if its effin’ Tatooine because there couldn’t be a more overused, boring planet. My second question is how in the bloody hell is this dude still breathing? I’m sure force-users (Dark Side especially) can withstand some brutal hits, but homeboy was sliced in two by my buddy Obi-Wan. So will he be rocking the robot leg look that he made look so fashionable in the non-continuity story from Star Wars: Visionaries? Maybe some sweet type of hover chair? That would be God awful but it wouldn’t be the first time us Star Wars fans were completely put out.
My last question is who will be voicing him? More specifically will it be Sam Witwer? For those of you non-hardcore Star Wars geeks, Sam Witwer is the guy who played Vader’s secret apprentice, Starkiller (Galen Marek) in the awesome Force Unleashed video game and it’s less than satisfying follow up the Force Unleashed 2.
He’s already had a stint in the Clone Wars in Season 3’s Mortis trilogy as the uber dark side using Anchorite The Son, which he completely owned. The guy also does an excellent Emperor Palpatine voice as evidenced in the Force Unleashed video games. It’s already been confirmed that Witwer will be returning to voice a character for this season 4 of the Clone Wars but it’s just a question of whom. Check out this little snippet from Witwer via Theforce.net that reveals absolutely nothing about whom he will play:
“Sam Witwer: I’ve already returned to The Clone Wars to do voiceover.
Riley: Oh really?
Sam Witwer: I am currently, as we speak, working on episodes, many episodes for a character that I have not played… well… it’s… what can I say without getting fired?
Riley: We don’t want you to get in trouble or anything.
Sam Witwer: I’m told the announcement is gonna happen in a couple months.
Riley: Nice tease!
Sam Witwer: It’s an amazing character. It is an amazing, amazing character. I’ll put it to you this way. I was driving over to a buddy’s house and Dave Filoni calls me up, gets me on the phone, and he says, “Listen, so we want you to come back to work and we need you to play…” and he tells me the character’s name. And I almost had a car accident. And he says, “Can you do it?” And I’m like yes. And then I worried about later whether I could do it or not. But I was like yes, yes, I will do that. So it is a tremendous opportunity and I can’t wait for you guys to find out about it.”
Now I wouldn’t call Darth Maul an amazing character or anything. Amazingly bad ass maybe, but character wise there wasn’t much to him. Even if you read any expanded universe material based on him it’s nothing to blow any skirts up. But Witwer did almost had a car accident, so that’s promising. He better not have risked his life on the account of finding out he was playing Wicket of the Ewoks or Uncle Owen…
This is to be the 3rd piece of a fairly new series here at Grizzly Bomb. For each feature we will examine an individual genre and the quality of its films produced within a specific decade, like, for example – the 25 Best Action Movies of the 90s or the 25 Best Comedies of the 80s. These lists will be compiled from a point system determined by votes from each member of the staff. It’s very scientific. We use Excel. So here it is…
30. Transformers (2007)
29. Signs (2002)
28. War of the Worlds (2005)
27. The Island (2005)
26. Equilibrium (2002)
25. Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (2005)
24. Idiocracy (2006)
23. Vanilla Sky (2001)
22. A.I. (2001)
21. Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (2004)
20. Evolution (2001)
19. Pitch Black (2000)
18. I Am Legend (2007)
17. Sunshine (2007)
16. Terminator: Salvation (2009)
15. Cloverfield (2008)
14. A Scanner Darkly (2006)
13. Primer (2004)
12. Children of Men (2006)
11. Moon (2009)
10. Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith
The third chapter in the prequel saga was easily it’s strongest, and though it obviously still can’t compare to the original movies, it’s not without its charms.
6 years worth of CG effects and stale acting all pay off when we finally see Anakin’s transformation. First he facilitates the murder of Mace Windu, slaughters some younglings, and then chokes out Padme. After that it’s all out war with Master Kenobi, which doesn’t go well for little Ani. The loss of his legs and subsequent dip into the river of lava left him slightly agitated, and triggered the emperor’s robots to transform him into the Vader we all knew and loved.
Best Quote: “You were the chosen one! It was said that you would destroy the Sith, not join them. You were to bring balance to the force, not leave it in darkness.”
Trivia: George Lucas originally intended to have Peter Cushing reprise his role as Tarkin, years after his death, through the use of stock footage and digital technology. However, the idea was scrapped when the footage of Cushing was deemed unusable.
9. Minority Report
Welcome to the world without crime. In the futuristic Washington DC, there’s no crime because your ass is put away the moment you think of committing a murder. Thanks to the all-powerful ‘Pre Cogs’ and the Pre-Crime unit, murders are virtually unheard of. And the system is flawless, or at least we are lead to believe so until the head of the Pre-Crime Unit (Cruise) is pegged by the trio of psychics for future murder.
One of Crusie’s last big hits before jumping on Oprah’s couch and alienating half the country, Minority Report also helped familiarize American’s with Colin Farrell’s name.
Best Quote: “Mr. Marks, by mandate of the District of Columbia Precrime Division, I’m placing you under arrest for the future murder of Sarah Marks and Donald Dubin that was to take place today, April 22 at 0800 hours and four minutes.”
ET meets Short Circuit. I think it was impossible for anyone who grew up in the 80s not to think that when they saw Wall-E. Pixar pretty much always hits it out of the park, but for me, this has to be looked at as one of their best. Poor little Wall-E, left to clean up the mess left by the lazy humans that thrashed the planet. So when we join him he’s plugging along doing an impossible job, doomed to die alone. Until that is the appearance of Eve. Wall-E falls in love and is inspired to follow her into space where we see what has happened to the remaining human population. This is basically a post apocalyptic tragedy disguised as a kids movie.
Best Quote: “Too much garbage in your face? There’s plenty of space out in space! BnL StarLiners leaving each day. We’ll clean up the mess while you’re away.”
Triva: Within the first 5 minutes there is monologue via the holographic billboards. The first dialogue between WALL·E and EVE begins 22 minutes into the movie. The first human dialogue begins 39 minutes into the movie.
7. Avatar
The single highest grossing film of all time (not adjusted for inflation) is 2009’s Avatar, a classic story that can be related to films like Disney’s Pocahontas, and has some pretty obvious pro-environment undertones. But it was successful not because of the story, but for 2 reasons in particular.
1. It was, simply put, the most visually stunning movie I have ever seen. It’s also the only movie I’ve seen where I can say it was worth the upcharge for the 3D. 2. The Party Crahser was in it.
Best Quote: “Well, well, well. I’d say diplomacy has failed. ”
Triva: Michael Biehn was considered for the role of Col. Quaritch. James Cameron rejected him because he’d already cast Sigourney Weaver, and he didn’t want people to think it was Aliens all over again.
6. Serenity
Here it is again. Ineptitude at FOX killed Firefly, a show that could have been our generation’s Star Trek even quicker than NBC killed the original Star Trek. The result was creator Joss Whedon releasing Serenity as a way to help close off the story and give fans some closure. Granted, it didn’t work as most of us are still clamoring for a revival, but this is where we are.
The movie itself is all about the River Tam situation finally coming to a head, as our beloved outlaws are hunted down by the Alliance’s finest assassin. Though sad, it was a fitting end as we are allowed to see Mal come out on top and get a win for the Browncoats.
Best Quote: “You all wanna be looking very intently at your own belly buttons. I see a head start to rise, violence is going to ensue. Probably guessed we mean to be thieving here but what we’re after is not yours. So, let’s have no undue fussing.” Trivia: In the cargo bay, just after a Reaver is shot, some of the crates behind River have the message “Reusable Container: Do Not Destroy” printed on them. It’s an inside joke. The ship set had to be rebuilt from scratch for the movie because the original, from the show, was destroyed.
5. District 9
District 9 took the alien genre in a whole new direction, taking place years after the aliens have arrived in South Africa. The story follows Wikus, a government agent tasked with relocating the segregated alien ‘Prawns’. The Prawns have lived in poverty in District 9 for 20 years, with little compassion from their human ‘hosts’. Once Wikus is exposed to their biotechnology and slowly transformed into one of them, the tables are quickly turned as the oppressor becomes the oppressed, and is soon sought after by his own government and forced to work alongside the ‘enemy’ to reverse the changes and help the aliens leave Earth. This is an alien movie that shows us who the real monsters are.
US Release: August 14, 2009 Director: Neill Blomkamp Notable Cast:Sharlto Copley Oscar Wins/Nominations: 0/4 (Best Picture, Film Editing, Visual Effects, Adapted Screenplay) US/Total Box Office: $115,646,235/$210,819,611 Best Quote: “Here, you can take that, you want to keep that, as a souvenir of your first abortion, ay. You can feel like you’ve done one of these too.” Triva: After the feature film based on theHalovideo game series which was to be directed by Neill Blomkamp fell through, producer Peter Jackson went to Blomkamp and offered him $30 million to make whatever he wanted. The result was this film.
4. 28 Days Later
This 2003 Sci-fi thriller helped launch current Zombie craze, though really it’s not about Zombies. This isn’t a case of the dead rising from there graves so much as it is an infection of RAGE!
Ok, the rage thing was kind of cheesy, but the movie was great. We got introduced to Cillian Murphy and depending on what theater you went to, you got 1 of 3 different endings.
Speed and aggressiveness would have to be key factors that set this apart from other Zombie-type movies.
Best Quote: “He was full of plans. Have you got any plans, Jim? Do you want us to find a cure and save the world or just fall in love and f–k? Plans are pointless. Staying alive’s as good as it gets.” Triva: Horror novelist Stephen King bought out an entire showing of the film in New York City.
3. Donnie Darko
Donnie Darko is the story of… well, a kid named Donnie Darko. Donnie suffers from extreme dissociation, time fugues, and insomniac hallucinations AKA Puberty. We follow Donnie (Jake Gyllenhaal) as he experiences weird dreams, hallucinations, thoughts of murder, moments of utter clarity, and creepy chats with a dude in the most horrific bunny costume ever seen. What we eventually find out is that Donnie is caught in a time loop, and only he can align his life properly to escape it, and save the world. I think. I guarantee you won’t figure that out after the first watching. This is a ‘time traveling’ mindf–k of a movie with a strange cast of A-list actors (Drew Barrymore, Patrick freakin Swayze), well deserved of it’s #3 spot.
US Release: October 26, 2001 Director: Richard Kelly Notable Cast:Jake Gyllenhaal, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Mary McDonnell, Holmes Osborne, Patrick Swayze, Seth Rogen, Jena Malone, Beth Grant, Noah Wyle, Ashley Tisdale, and Drew Barrymore. Oscar Wins/Nominations: 0/0 US Box Office: $1,270,522 Best Quote: “You’re right, actually. I am pretty- I’m, I’m pretty troubled and I’m, I’m pretty confused. But I… and I’m afraid. Really, really afraid. Really afraid. But I… I… I think you’re the f–king Antichrist.” Triva: The movie takes place in 1988. Frank tells Donnie the world will end in 28 days, 06 hours, 42 minutes, and 12 seconds. If you add these numbers, the sum is 88. When Samantha asks when she can have kids, Donnie says: “Not until 8th grade.” Donnie mentions to his therapist that his dog Callie died when he was eight. (He is later seen holding a stuffed toy dog in her office.) Donnie jokes about the Back to the Future DeLorean which had a speed of 88 MPH. According to the television reporter, the fire at Jim Cunningham’s house was extinguished “sometime after 8:00 last night.” The red-eye flight that almost crashes is Flight 2806 which boards at Gate 42 at 12 AM. The climax of Donnie Darko occurs one week before the 1988 US presidential election, when George Bush won on November 8, 1988 11/08/88. The movie was shot (for a budget of less than US $5 million) in 28 days. There are 28 scenes in the director’s cut of this film.
2. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
In my mind, this is right up there with The Dark Knight as the biggest Oscar snubs since the turn of the century. Jim Carrey’s sad bastard ‘Joel’ is stuck in his own mind as he’s hired a company to go in and erase any memory of his ex-girlfriend. During the process though he changes his mind and decides he doesn’t want to let go of her, leading to an epic game off hide and seek within his mind to try to save her from deletion. Carrey’s performance, the best of his career, really cuts true to anyone who has suffered heartbreak and just wanted to forget. The film though comes full circle when Joel and his ex – Clementine Kruczynski have a chance meeting and fall for each other again. It’s maybe the most warped romance ever.
Best Quote: “Well, technically speaking, the operation is brain damage, but it’s on a par with a night of heavy drinking. Nothing you’ll miss.” Trvia: The original screenplay by Charlie Kaufman included a short conversation between Joel (Jim Carrey) and Clementine (Kate Winslet) about the album “Rain Dogs” by Tom Waits during one of the opening scenes on the train. During this conversation Joel says he remembers buying the album and liking it, but he can’t remember anything about it. While the dialogue was stripped from the film, during the fast shots of Stan (Mark Ruffalo) showing Joel the items he has brought in that remind him of Clementine a copy of the CD “Rain Dogs” can be seen for just a moment. Also the “blue ruin” reference comes from a lyric on the same album.
1. Star Trek
2009’s Star Trek was a smash hit, and in a rare turn, it was actually the best movie of all the Trek movies, which isn’t something you often see in the 11th chapter of a franchise. I’m looking at you Moonraker. What Abrams did here was effectively launch another sequel, but also successfully rebooted the franchise. This was for me, the best movie of 2009, just edging out Inglourious Basterds. It was action packed, and funny, and the cast was great and extremely likable which isn’t easy when you’re replacing icons. The upcoming Star Trek 2 (12) is one of the most anticipated movies pending right now, and that is because this one was so universally enjoyed. Live long and prosper baby!
Best Quote: “Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Her ongoing mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life-forms and new civilizations; to boldly go where no one has gone before.” Triva: There is a supposed “odd-numbered movie curse” associated with the Star Trek films in which the odd-numbered films tend to be weaker and the even-numbered ones tend to be stronger. This curse was supposedly proved false with the poor reception of film ten, Star Trek: Nemesis This new Star Trek is the eleventh film. Years before, Simon Pegg‘s character in Spaced joked that every odd-numbered Star Trek film being “shit” was a fact of life. Pegg noted: “Fate put me in the movie to show me I was talking out of my ass.”
So that is our list, I hope you enjoyed it. Here are a few fun facts about the results…
MOST APPEARANCES IN THE TOP 30
Chiwetel Ejifor/Ewan McGregor/Glenn Morshower/Odette Annable/Jamie McBride/Julie White/Cillian Murphy/Tom Cruise/Mitch Baker/Sean Bean/Christian Bale/Sam Rockwell/Terry Crews/Jude Law/Giovanni Ribisi/Julianne Moore/Anton Yelchin/Sam Worthington (2 Movies Each)
MOST FREQUENT DIRECTOR
1. Stephen Spielberg – 3 Movies (War of the Worlds, AI, Minority Report)
2. Michael Bay – 2 Movies (The Island, Transformers)
MOST POPULAR YEAR
1. 2005, 2009 (5 Movies Each)
2. 2001 (4 Movies)
3. 2002, 2004, 2006, 2007 (3 Movies)
4. 2008 (2 Movies Each)
5. 2000, 2003 (0 Movies)
Let it begin! Two new episodes of Clone Wars premiere tonight! And on the same day as the movies on Blu-Ray, what more could a Star Wars geek ask? The first episode being reviewed is ‘Water War’! Sounds like a kid’s theme park or something but trust me it’s anything but. The episode deals with the planet of Mon Calamari and the always constant bickering between the Quarren race and the Mon Cala themselves. (I always called them Mon Cal, but who am I to argue with the fish heads?) Thanks to the meddling of a creepy looking sharky faced Separatist ambassador, the bickering comes to a battle between the two species, with the Quarren obviously siding with the Separatists and the Mon Cala with the Republic. This is the first under water battle we’ve seen on screen from Star Wars and it was quack-tastic….
The visuals and animation on this show gets better and better with each season and season 4 is no different. The underwater battles were breathtaking even though as a geek I still question how blasters are being fired underwater. The Hydroid Medusa weapons of the Separatists were another example of the great animation. Even the underwater sounds throughout the episode stood out to me, because at least if they were following certain aspects of physics throughout, they got the voices and sounds right.
Of course ‘Captain’ Ackbar being in the episode was awesome, but it was nice to have a couple new characters to build on. Prince Lee-Char of the Mon Cala was likeable enough as the wet behind the ears leader of his people…. I guess he’d be wet everywhere but you get the idea. The Shark man Separatist Tamson was certainly a vicious and unrelenting foe. The part where he was pursuing Ahsoka and Lee-Char and tearing into Mon Cala troops kind of creeped me out. But that’s a good thing! Hopefully in the following episode he survives to give a credible villain besides Ventress, Cad Bane and Grievous (the General being credible is debatable). I can’t count Savage Oppress because I’m thinking he’s going to be used sparingly this season.
I give the episode a 4 out of 5 bears. Between the visuals and new characters it was a satisfying premiere for me. It also was a pleasant surprise to have an episode end with the Republic in defeat for the moment. The show itself needs more Separatist victories to stay interesting. Can’t wait for the next episode, check out my review of it: ‘Gungan Attack‘.
Okay, now there is another Star Wars first, seeing the Mon Calamari placed in internment camps as slaves… how depressing. It happens in this episode, then after the Empire forms in the Expanded Universe and once more in the EU when Darth Krayt orders all Mon Calamari systematically exterminated. But the episode itself was quite a follow up to the first. The Mon Cala, although defeated in the last episode fight on against Tamson and his droids along with their Quarren allies.
After the news about the impending changes to the Blu-Ray versions of the original Star Wars trilogy, the internet as a whole took advantage of a fairly slow Labor Day weekend and produced some gold.
Grizzly Bomb 