All posts by Josef Rodriguez

Hey, I'm Joey and I'm a (usually) film and pop culture blogger, but I'll write about pretty much anything.
Movie News & Opinions

‘Muppets’ Sequel in the Works, Segel Not Writing

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A sequel to the November hit musical, The Muppets, is moving into development after an announcement from Walt Disney confirmed the film. Director James Bobin and screenwriter Nicholas Stoller will be returning, but it seems as if Jason Segel won’t be returning for another round of writing for the sequel. This isn’t to say that he still won’t co-star, but he cites his commitments to “How I Met Your Mother”, as well as other projects he’s working on, as the reason he’s not returning as writer.

Now, Nicholas Stoller and Jason Segel have been collaborators for quite a long time. Stoller directed Segel’s screenplay for Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and then took over as writer and director for the spin-off, Get Him To The Greek. Both of those films are absolutely hilarious, so I have no fear that The Muppets sequel won’t be great. My hope is that Segel will return to star in the sequel, and that Bret McKinzie will also return as composer. I mean, the guy won an Oscar for “Man or Muppet”, he probably has a pretty good incentive to come back, right?

Images: Disney, The Muppets

MOVIES

Grizzly Review: Act of Valor

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The Navy SEALs have been dramatized in many movies over the last fifty years, but according to ex-SEALs, almost none of them got it right. So, when writers and directors Kurt Johnstad, Mike McCoy, and Scott Waugh were working on developing the most recent addition to the Navy SEAL filmography, Act of Valor, they realized that the only way to make the film correctly was to cast actual SEALs in the primary roles. That’s exactly what they did, and let me tell you, it’s pretty much a disaster.


Act of Valor features mostly nameless characters with absolutely no back story whatsoever. The names of the SEALs who, I guess, portray other SEALs, have been kept confidential for their own safety and the safety of their country. In short, Act of Valor has nothing resembling a plot, and it’s really not even a movie in the conventional sense of the word. There are a couple of intertwining stories, but overall, the whole thing is kind of just the SEALs going from mission to mission to mission taking orders and getting the job done.

When I say that Act of Valor isn’t really a movie, I simply mean that it’s really just a recruitment video stretched to feature length. I’m sure you’ve seen those Air Force commercials that have the transforming jet and the big load of bulls***? Yeah, well imagine that for 98 minutes, and you get an idea of how excruciating this movie is. To add to the propaganda-induced seizure that I was already having when I watched this movie, I was dawning on the realization that casting real life SEALs was an awful, awful idea. Actually, let me rephrase, I didn’t dawn on a realization, the realization dawned on me, and soon enough, it punched me in the face, because the acting in this movie is worse than a high school play. Granted, I realize that they’re not actors, blah, blah, but  for God’s sake did you have to cast the most inept-looking SEALs that you could find? I mean, honestly, I felt like the directors were just f***ing with us for a good laugh.

To add to the horror is the invading patriotism that just infected every orifice of my being when I was watching this. The film was partially produced by the Navy, so it’s obvious that the Americans are going to win, but I’ll be damned if this wasn’t the most artificial piece of realistic storytelling I’ve ever seen. Not only is the plot so obvious a toddler could figure it out, but Act of Valor is so concerned with being Pro-SEALs that it sacrifices anything involving a character dilemma, a twist, or even any real interest for the sake of being patriotic. The characters are more wooden than a picket fence, and they aren’t really even characters as much as they are little Call of Duty CG creations that refuse to have a personality.

As for the directing, remember all that innovative camerawork that we saw in the previews that made us want to go see the movie? Yeah, well, the shots seen are the only shots that are even worth looking at. The rest are either shaky enough to cause an epileptic to just give up and die, or they’re used once, and then again. And again. And again. And again, until what was once an interesting way to film something turns into a cheap gimmick that will make you tired of the film’s attempt at entertainment.

My last complaint is the score. It builds tension so artificially, making it impossible to be surprised by anything happening in the entire movie. I really felt like one of those test subjects sent in to watch a series of test videos to gauge how they would fare in the mainstream audience. Act of Valor is an oddly off-putting experience that just put a bad taste in my mouth. I feel like I’m going to get a lot of s*** for hating on this movie, but it’s true. Act of Valor is an action film that almost insults SEALs instead of commemorating them like it should. And the action isn’t even that good!

0/5 Bears

Movie News & Opinions

The 25 Most Anticipated Films of 2012

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We seem to spend a lot of time talking about the various new mind-blowing movies that come out bigger and better every year. So we figured it was time to bring out the science again and put together a list of our 25 Most Anticipated Films of 2012.

Now we are only talking about the March-September slate of movies as some haven’t received official release dates yet, so keep that in mind.

Each member of the staff made a list. These lists will be compiled from a point system determined by votes from each member of the staff. It’s very scientific, we used Excel. Our resident cinephile joey123mo will take a look at each movie and outline why it made our list of Most Anticipated Films of 2012!

Continue reading The 25 Most Anticipated Films of 2012 →

MOVIES

Grizzly Review: Wanderlust

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In 2001, the cult comedy to top all cult comedies, Wet Hot American Summer, was released to rather negative reviews (obviously). Garnering an A from Entertainment Weekly, but low markings from pretty much everywhere else, the film was discarded into oblivion after its release, only to resurface as a God of the cult world a few years later. Director and co-writer David Wain had since then made a couple of movies including The Ten and the critical and commercial success, Role Models, which definitely took a turn for the subdued in the “Wain humor” category.

Continue reading Grizzly Review: Wanderlust →

Movie News & Opinions

‘I Am Legend’ Prequel (Or Possibly Sequel) In The Works

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A new I Am Legend movie is currently in the works. Produced by Warner Brothers, and with a screenplay penned by Arash Amel, the reported follow up to the 2007 film has little else as of now. Writer Amel’s only other writing credits are two films that are currently in production, including a CIA thriller starring Aaron Eckhart called The Expatriate.

There’s little news as to what direction the film might go in, but since Will Smith’s character died at the end of I Am Legend, it’s unlikely that a sequel would be the right way to go if Warner Bros. wants to cast Smith in the lead, which they do. Then again, a prequel wouldn’t be much better, would it? It’d essentially be two hours of Will Smith watching everyone in New York die before his eyes while him and his dog just chill out and watch.

Thus far, the film, whose original is based off the novel of the same name by Richard Matheson, has neither a director nor a star. Warner Bros. are shooting to get the original film’s director, Francis Lawrence, back behind the camera. They’re also shooting to get Smith back in the lead, but the more I think about it, the less sense it makes.

To be perfectly frank, the 2007 I Am Legend was a great Will Smith action flick that worked extremely well as a standalone film. Making $585 million dollars worldwide on a $150 million dollar budget, as well as earning a positive 69% on Rotten Tomatoes, the film was both a critical and commercial success backed by a great performance by Will Smith.

Matheson’s novel has been adapted into films two times. The first being The Last Man on Earth in 1964, and a second time in 1971 with the name, The Omega Man. The fact that Hollywood execs are trying to squeeze out a sequel for a movie that was obviously meant to be stand-alone isn’t surprising, but it’s definitely disappointing. Personally, I hope that Will Smith denies it, but he’s got to put food on the table, right?

MOVIES

Grizzly Review: Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie

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It’s always an exciting and equally worrisome affair when your favorite TV show or internet sensation gets their own movie. On the bright side, that gem of a show that you love and cherish oh so much is finally getting the feature film treatment that they deserve. But, on the downside, if big budget investors step in and ruin what made the source material so great, well, then you as the viewer have to deal with the heartbreak. There’s also the rare occasion when the program still airs after the movie has come out and it just flat-out sucks. A victim of this horrible occurrence? The one and only Spongebob Squarepants Movie. Great movie, everything after 2005 on the show was just complete and total s***.

Adult Swim comic geniuses Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim, known for their extremely odd television program, “Tim and Eric, Awesome Show! Great Job!” have finally been honored with a feature film entitled, Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie. Known for their random sketch comedy and short but hilarious ideas, many fans of the show were worried that when stretched to feature-length, the dynamic duo would lose their edge and the entire movie would just be one big, bad joke.

The plot involves Tim and Eric wasting a billion dollars on a movie funded by Schlaaang, a fictitious production company led by the diabolical Tommy Schlaaang (Robert Loggia), who, after screening the movie and complaining, “I spent a billion dollars on this piece of s***?!”, demands that Tim and Eric get him his money back or he’ll kill them both. After getting Hollywood makeovers, they realize that they can no longer manage to afford the life of glitz and glamour that they love dearly. After being forced to fire their spiritual guide Jim Joe Kelly (Zach Galifianakis), they go to their favorite night club to deal with their remorse, making a plan to drink themselves into oblivion and do countless stupid things.

While in the bathroom, Eric sees an advertisement at his urinal that claims to have the answers to all the problems. The S’Wallow Valley Mall, located in the “historic S’Wallow Valley” needs a new owner. Damien Weebs (Will Ferrell), the current operator of the S’Wallow Valley Mall promises anyone who comes to “run my mall” a billion dollar paycheck. Desperately, Tim and Eric decide to make the trip out and see if they can get their billion dollars.

Arriving at the entrance, the two men suddenly realize how decrepit and possibly diseased this place is. Hobos are scattered all over the floor, the place looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in days, but low and behold, there are still a few shops up and running. After an awkward meeting with Weebs which includes two back-to-back viewings of Top Gun, Tim and Eric decide to take over the mall under the name Dobin PR.

Tim and Eric are Gods in the world of cult classics, with Hall of Fame photos right next to Tommy Wiseau and Jared and Jerusha Hess. They had an extremely successful show on Adult Swim until 2010, when the pair decided that they had stretched themselves to their comedic limits as far as the show was concerned. They then started working on Billion Dollar Movie, abbreviated as B$M, and the final product is this masterpiece of comedic cinema that I’m reviewing right now.

The only possible comparison that I can give this movie is Napoleon Dynamite meets A Serbian Film. The humor is equal parts bizarre and disgusting, and you know that the thing that most comedy films have, it’s called a heart? Yeah, well this movie doesn’t have that. When your movie involves a small child being blown to smithereens mid-air, you know you’ve got a hit on your hands. The performances are surprisingly committed from the supporting cast, but John C. Reilly steals the show as Taquito, a sickly homeless man who was abandoned at the mall when he was a child. Literally everything that came out of that man’s mouth during this movie had me busting out in laughter, no matter how sickening it could have been.

Will Forte plays Allen Bishopman, a vengeful sword salesman who plans to rat out the whereabouts of Tim and Eric to the Schlaaang corporation. Forte plays the role extremely well, offering up quite a bit of gut busting laughter whenever he’s on screen. In fact, most of the cast members of B$M have had recurring roles on “Awesome Show, Great Job!” so they’re extremely familiar with the often irreverent material of Tim and Eric.

Many fans have complained of the film’s rather linear storytelling, but I find it to be a blessing in disguise. At the end of the day, there’s a reason why episodes of “Awesome Show, Great Job!” are only 10 minutes long. Because, unlike Jackass, 95 minutes of oddball skits can get very old, very quickly, and B$M quickly finds a wonderful balance between what worked on the TV show, and what works in a feature film. In fact, I applaud Tim and Eric’s ability to create a feature film out of a premise that seems impossibly short-winded.

Fans and newbies alike will find something to love in Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie. Produced by Funny or Die pioneers Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, the film is an inviting introduction to the most lovable idiots since Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, but is also a faithful jump to the big screen for longtime fans. Granted, this movie isn’t for everybody, but if it is for you, you’ll be getting a nice dose of shrim in your life.

4.5/5 Grizzly’s