Yesterday, Comedy Central aired the South Park Season 15 Finale. For those of you who may have missed it, here is a little recap:
In the beginning of this episode, Kenny’s family is fighting while he is watching an episode of “White Trash in Trouble”. He sees that his house is being raided by the TV show. Kenny’s parents are taken to jail, and the kids interviewed by Child Protective Services, who puts them with a foster family. Kenny and his brother and sister get sent to a strict agnostic home full of other foster children.
Butters and Cartman investigate into who is the poorest kid in school is now that Kenny is gone, which turns out to be Cartman.
The agnostic man of the house is absolutely hilarious. They are not to take the lord’s name in vein just in case he exists, and their house motto is full of uncertainties. It had me cracking up.The prayer at the dinner table was my favorite part. Another favorite part is that while in the agnostic household, all they drink is Dr. Pepper, because there is no certainty of what it actually is. Not quite root beer… not quite cola.
Cartman and Kenny begin attending a new school. Cartman did an extremely long song and dance number, with over 40 yo’ mama jokes in it, to make fun of the poorest kid in school.
The Crow is a movie that, like its protagonist, managed to find a second life for itself long after its release in 1994. It continues to hold a cult status today for its dark theme and pioneering of the gritty superhero story arc, but of course it bears even more recognition as the film which resulted in the tragic death of its lead, Brandon Lee.
Much like the recent passing of Heath Ledger and The Dark Knight (Nobody saw ‘Imaginarium‘ so it doesn’t count, before you jump down my throat), The Crow stands as the final showcase of Lee’s promising talent, so it carries an almost memorial-like status for fans. It’s a delicate thing to steamroll over, but that’s just what Relativity Media are trying to do.
In April, Relativity was interested in Bradley Cooper to star, but he had to drop out for ‘scheduling reasons’ and while the studio looked at replacing him with Channing Tatum or Mark Wahlberg, the project inevitably was put on hold (hopefully to beat the casting director with a chair), as quoted here by Hollywood Reporter:
“Bradley Cooper was to have played the title character but sources tell The Hollywood Reporter that he has now exited due to scheduling conflicts. Cooper has David O. Russell’s Silver Linings Playbook shooting this fall and then dives straight into Legendary’s Paradise Lost, which shoots first quarter next year…the exact time Relativity plans on making the high-priority Crow […] But akin to the project’s rock musician who is killed and resurrected, two new names have surfaced as possible replacements: Channing Tatum and Mark Wahlberg.”
With Cooper out and director Juan Carlos Fresnadillo following suit, the production seems to be dead in the water, but we are now able to check out a slew of just-released concept art by Diego Latorre, courtesy Shock Till You Drop, which gives us a look at the general tone and direction the remake would have followed:
From Latorre himself: “‘The Crow’ images published are very early production sketches and are based in my own visual interpretation of the character and not necessarily in Apaches Entertainment and director Juan Carlos Fresnadillo’s vision.”
For all the concept art, click here. To reminisce on the days before they tried to give The Crow cornrows, click here.
Former Wu-Tang member Robert Diggs, better known as RZA, has been cast as Thaddeus, a role that hasn’t had much news released about it. As well as that, Sacha Baron Cohen has been cast as Scotty, a role that also hasn’t had much disclosure. In fact, the entire film itself has thus far been kept under wraps relatively well, considering you haven’t read the PDF version of the script floating around the internet.
Be as skeptical as you want, but The RZA can act. Surprisingly well, I might add. Besides doing some of the soundtrack for the Kill Bill films, RZA’s face has been popping up in numerous projects like Coffee and Cigarettes, Funny People, American Gangster, Repo Men, Due Date, The Next Three Days, and most recently, A Very Harold and Kumar 3D Christmas. He’s known for being a scene-stealer, and there’s a good chance he’ll fulfill that duty in Django.
As far as Sacha Baron Cohen, we all know and love him from films like Borat, Bruno, Talladega Nights, the Madagascar movies, and Sweeney Todd. He’ll soon be starring in a new film called The Dictator (not to be confused as a remake of the 1940 Charlie Chaplin film, The Great Dictator), which will be directed by Borat/Bruno director, Larry Charles. Cohen will also be portraying Freddie Mercury in an upcoming and unnamed Queen biopic.
As for participating in Django, Cohen is a special kind of actor. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but if he’s in a movie, the role was most likely written for him, so seeing him in a Tarantino film leads me to think that his role will be not only extremely interesting, but hovering around genius. I trust both Cohen and Tarantino when it comes to successfully making great films, so there’s no reason that a collaboration between the two won’t be explosive.
Tarantino is known for his offbeat but almost always-successful casting, and with stars of this caliber, there’s no doubt in my mind that Django Unchained will be one of the best films of 2012.
Welcome to The Griz Bin, a weekly look at the wide world of comic related nonsense that we all know and love.
The X-Men Guide To Puberty: If you have to ask ‘how many penises is normal?’ this pamphlet is for you – [CollegeHumor]
The 6 Creepiest Comic Book Characters of All Time: Not creepy as in that weird guy is looking at you, more like this horse just fondled you and now wants cab fare – [Cracked]
Gorgeous Gwen & MJ Pin-Ups: I shouldn’t need to say anything else – [ComicsAlliance]
DC Comics track record when it comes to animation has been great. They continually blow the competition out of the water, and it goes back a long time. Marvel has had a few successes, but its rare for a Marvel show to last more than 2 seasons, where its rare for a DC show to be canceled before 4. Everybody remembers Super Friends, and Batman: The Animated Series is widely considered to be the definitive Batman series.
So with the new Green Lantern cartoon sharing the title of The Animated Series, it shows a certain confidence by the DC Universe team in their newest show. And it couldn’t happen at a better time. Green Lantern has been reaching new levels of popularity recently, but has never had an animated series devoted strictly to him. When the CG series was announced there was a lot of debate over the animation, but more were cautiously optimistic than negatively opposed. Well, the wait is over.
For the decade plus, I’ve been telling anyone who would listen that I felt Batman & Robin was the worst movie of all time. And that’s not a passing remark. This is something I’ve really thought a lot about. I spent over 5 years working behind video store counters in my youth, getting paid to talk movies with costumers, so this is a conversation that’s happened hundreds of times. A lot of people think I’m picking something at random when they ask me because I answer so quickly. People laugh and agree it sucked, but the worst ever? Often times they doubt me, but they haven’t put the thought I have into it. This is a movie with a $110 million dollar budget (back when that meant something), an established Director, great cast and most importantly, an icon that has endured for the better part of a century. Bat Nipples…
Let’s start at the head: Director Joel Schumacher. Prior to 1997, Schumacher had a mostly stellar reputation. Aside from the obvious The Lost Boys, he also put out A Time to Kill, Flatliners, andFalling Down. All of which were pretty well received. I know I was a fan. But in 1997, he spent $110 million (which is more than it took to make all 4 of the aforementioned films) on a mockery of everything DC and Tim Burton had spent so much time shaping.
The Dark Knight got dark again in the 1970s and 1980s, thanks largely to Frank Miller, and the guys at DC wanted a movie to reflect that. They spent most of the 80s trying to get one made, and finally, in 1989 we got Tim Burton’s Batman. It was as far from the hokey 60’s television show as you could have gotten, and it redefined Batman for a new generation. No “BAM! KAPOW!”, but instead a seriously darker look at Gotham City and the Caped Crusader.
The TV show in the 1960’s was a necessary step to keeping ‘Batman’, who was on the verge of his comic getting canceled, alive. And the show achieved that goal. It made Batman relevant again, or at least popular enough to keep his comic going. And while the 1970’s brought the seriousness back to the book, and reintroduced The Joker as a legitimate threat, Batman’s rep was already tarnished by the very show that saved him.
So there we were, 20 years after the end of the TV show and Burton’s Batman comes out and crushes everything at the box office. Batman was reborn.
After 20 years of fighting to rebuild Batman’s image, it was finally a success. The ‘Dark Knight’ was dark once more. Burton pumped out a sequel that saw more of the Gotham built-in the first movie, and shortly after that we got one of the greatest cartoons of all time.
Then, in 1995, Joel Schumacher was handed the franchise and it took a turn.
At first glance Schumacher must’ve seemed like a perfect fit. Flatliners was dark as Hell and Falling Down was as hardcore a vigilante movie as we’d seen since Charlie Bronson’s Death Wish.
But what we got was a lighter Batman then we’d seen in the previous 2 movies.Batman Foreverwasn’t completely terrible, but it certainly didn’t hold a candle to its predecessors. Sure, Jim Carrey’s ‘Riddler’ was gonna lighten things up by nature.
And it’s not Schumacher’s fault that the writers destroyed Two-Face, turning him in a joke. And let’s face it, Robin was forced on him.
All these factors, along with Keaton leaving the title role were going to handicap Schumacher, so in large, he got a pass.
2 years later we get Batman & Robin. Surely Schumacher has ironed out the kinks from the last film, right? WRONG. He took everything wrong with the 3rd movie, and expanded on it. He made it Cheesier. He introduced a Bat-Credit Card. Brought in Batgirl in the dumbest way imaginable, and put nipples on the Bat-Suit. Because nothing strikes fear in the hearts of villainy like erect male nipples. Schumacher ignored the very purpose of the first movie and reverted back to the exact garbage they were trying to escape.
Next, the cast:
[quote] “[The cast] is quite a line-up, boasting a broad choice of dramatic styles, and what lends the movie cohesion and integrity is the fact that all those involved have come up with their worst imaginable performances…You sit there feeling brain-damaged and praying for the mayhem to cease.” – Anthony Lane, The New Yorker. [/quote]
Like him or not, George Clooney is a good actor. I loved Out of Sight and I thought he was perfect in From Dusk Till Dawn. Then the Academy also liked him in all those Oscar type movies for which he was nominated. I really don’t think you can blame Clooney for ruining this. If I were asked to play Batman I’d of said yes too, regardless of the script.
So then, next to Clooney we bring in Alicia Silverstone, still hot coming off of Clueless and it kills her career. Silverstone was another actress I liked, but she never really recovered from her inclusion in here to reach the heights previously expected of her.
And on the other side of the law, 2 of my all time favorites: Arnold and Uma.
I mean look at that, what the F? Polar Bear slippers? This man is dead inside, he wouldn’t wear Polar Bear slippers to keep his feet warm. I love Schwarzenegger, but this might be his low point, and yes, I’m includingHercules in New York.
As far as Uma, there is no doubt this is her lowest point. What’s sad is these are 2 of my favorite villains and seeing them misused here…well, as Charles Barkley would say: Turrible. And let’s not forget, they took Bane. The man who broke the bat, and turned him into a brainless joke of a henchmen.
So you have a huge budget for the time, a strong cast, a respected Director, and a cultural Icon. You take all that and give us what amounts to Sub-B movie. Schumacher had a responsibility to the character and he failed. It was because of this colossal failure that a lot of planned comic movies got shelved, and it wasn’t till Singer did X-Men 3 years later that people started to forget how Schumacher had undone all of Burton’s work.
Well EMPIRE a while back conducted a poll and released a list of the 50 WORST MOVIES EVER MADE. And guess who feels vindicated? Booyah. #1 with a bullet on that list: BATMAN & ROBIN. Not only did it win this dubious honor, but it racked up more than three times as many votes as the second place flop BATTLEFIELD EARTH.
Other notables making the list:
#50 – Spiderman 3
#46 – Howard the Duck
#45 – Blade Trinity
#44 – Matrix Revolutions
#41 – Van Helsing (Screw You Wolverine)
#40 – Superman IV: The Quest for Peace
#39 – Dungeons and Dragons
#37 – Max Payne
#36 – Eragon
#35 – House of the Dead
#32 – The Spirit (Should’ve been higher)
#27 – Street Fighter
#25 – Transformers 2
#15 – Catwoman (Just edging out PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE)
#13 – The Avengers (Uma, NOOOOO!)
#9 – Highlander 2
Yesterday, Comedy Central aired the South Park Season 15 Finale. For those of you who may have missed it, here is a little recap:
Butters and Cartman investigate into who is the poorest kid in school is now that Kenny is gone, which turns out to be Cartman.
Cartman and Kenny begin attending a new school. Cartman did an extremely long song and dance number, with over 40 yo’ mama jokes in it, to make fun of the poorest kid in school.
Grizzly Bomb 
