The Wolfman, starring Benicio del Toro and Sir Anthony Hopkins came out last year to poor reviews and a low box office. This was shattering to the studio that had planned for a money making trilogy to cash in on the recent drive for all things werewolves and vampires.
“I said he flip ya. Flip ya for real.” – The Usual Suspects? Nobody gets me…
So you’d think that with The Wolfman ‘failing’ at the theaters that would be it for the movie. But no, that just is never the case these days. So instead of just going ahead with their planned sequel, they have reportedly opted instead to simply remake the movie… again. After only one year.
Universal is saying that it’s a remake of the classic version and not the one from a year ago. But the one from a year ago was a remake of the classic version as well, so really who knows anymore. Also they may call it Werewolf, further throwing originality out the window.
One of the review excerpts in an advertisement for Superman: Earth One quoted it as “What do you get when you combine Twilight and a classic superhero? The new Superman”, and I’ve come to the decision that those words are stupid.
I would lean more towards saying it’s like Smallville minus the five seasons of high school and college nonsense. It’s actually better though not to compare it to anything else, because it is simply a re-imagining of the Superman mythos. Much as Grant Morrison’s All Star Superman was. The story was written by veteran J. Michael Straczynski.
The parade of the shirtless teenage werewolves continues. MTV, taking a break from their daily contribution towards the retardation of tomorrow, has released a trailer for their upcoming TV series – Teen Wolf. They claim this is somehow a reboot of the classic Michael J. Fox movie of the same title, but I don’t see it. More on that later. Let’s first focus on how stupid this idea is to begin with. You’re gonna take a movie that is over 25 years old, staring an actor that has been, for the most part, retired from movies for the better part of 15 years, and you’re gonna make it into a show on MTV. That means, the people who are old enough to remember and love the movie are mostly those who are too old to still watch MTV. And those young enough to still like MTV are too young to remember the movie or even recognize Michael J. Fox for the icon he is. So this results in severely agitating the first crowd, while having to explain to the latter that werewolves did in fact exist in media prior to Twilight.
If you want to cash in on the Twilight fanatics, call the show Shirtless Wolf or Teen Angst Filled Dogs. But do not tarnish the name of one of my childhood favorites while marketing to an audience whose never ever seen it.
Anyhow, before moving further, lets check out the trailer…
I apologize for the shitty quality of the video, but it’s gonna be a shitty show, so I thought it fitting.
Now those of you that remember the movie, you might notice somethings are a little different here:
– He doesn’t come from a long line of wolves who can control themselves socially, but instead is viciously attacked in the woods and turned into one who can’t attend parties. You know, like in every Werewolf movie ever…EXCEPT Teen Wolf.
– I saw in the trailer exactly ZERO scenes where he dunks a basketball. He instead plays Lacrosse, a sport reserved almost exclusively for Douchebags.
– A very serious lack of ‘Van Surfing’.
– At no point in this trailer do an entire group of kids chant “Wolf. Wolf. Wolf.”
– It’s also not very believable; though they do show a high school party, they do not show anyone biting through a can of beer. I mean seriously, come on.
– And as far as I can tell, there isn’t a single character named “Boof”.
To see what I’m talking about, here is the trailer for the REAL Teen Wolf.
So welcome to 2011. Where we ruin everything, thus damning tomorrow’s generation to a bitter life filled with a terrible view of how cool Vampires and Werewolves were when we were young.
Grizzly Bomb 