Batman: Arkham Asylum, Arkham City and Beyond… What We Want Next

I didn’t think a sequel to Arkham Asylum would ever be able to outdo its predecessor. But in an age where video games are all about topping the previous installment in terms of scope and depth, Arkham City did just that. Arkham City was huge compared to Arkham Asylum with familiar locales such as Crime Alley and the Ice Berg Lounge to geek out the countless Batman faithful out there. And if you thought that Asylum sported a good amount of the Batman Rogues Gallery, it was nothing compared to Arkham City. From Two Face to Mad Hatter, Arkham city showcased over a dozen of Batman’s greatest villains in roles small and large. So the next question is; where does the story go from here given what happened at the end of Arkham City? As those of you who have beaten the game know, there was a death at the end which is a pretty large void to fill. What villains should be featured in the next installment? I can think of a few that didn’t show up and a couple from Arkham Asylum that were noticeably absent from Arkham City.

Below we will discuss which villains need to make the cut next and what the possible story could be for the next Arkham sequel. So please don’t read any further if you haven’t beaten Arkham City because I’ll dropping spoiler almost immediately.

So we all know that the Joker is dead. D-E-A-D. And I doubt he’ll be coming back since Mark Hamil has stated that he won’t be back to voice the Clown Prince of Crime in any future Batman material. I’m fine with Joker being dead by the way, and it’s for the best because I wouldn’t want to see anyone voicing the Joker again. Hamil owned that role and for as big of a Star Wars fan that I am, I think that Hamil’s career is defined by the excellent work he has done voicing the Joker these past twenty years. Luke Skywalker comes in a close second. I can’t see anyone else voicing the Joker as well as Mark Hamil and would like to tip my hat to him.

Now, if you did some exploring to past locales after beating the game and you happened to go back to the Joker’s hideout at Sionis Industries you’ll find an interesting tid-bit on the floor next to Harley’s Arkham Asylum outfit. Yes, it’s a pregnancy test that is POSITIVE!

Also at the end of the credits you’ll hear Harley singing Hush little baby to someone in her own twisted way. That means we may have a baby Joker on the way? Oh, boy…. If done right this could be very interesting indeed. This would also mean that the next game would have to take place years down the road. And if we’re introducing the son of the Joker as Batman’s next big nemesis then I’d be all for them bringing Damien Wayne into play as well. Son of Batman v.s. Son of Joker? Sounds like a dream come true if you ask me! Talia did die after all, before Bruce could have any knowledge of little Damien if they decided to have him be a part of this Bat-continuity.

Also, if the games just want to continue going bigger and bigger in terms of environment then I suggest Rocksteady break free of the Arkham aspect and simply call the game Gotham City or Gotham Knights. This way the entire city can be opened up to play in and we can see plenty of other Gotham locations such as Wayne Tower. Actually, Wayne Tower would be the perfect place for the game’s climax if there is a final fight between Bruce and Joker Jr. or Damien and Joker Jr. I’d like to see Wayne Manor (Bat Cave included), Blackgate Prison, the Wayne Botanical Garden and even a revisiting of good old Arkham Asylum.

Now to the villains and my favorite part. There were not a whole lot left out of Arkham City that’s for sure, but there are a couple that I think would make good additions to the third installment. One of the most deranged villains and a personal favorite of mine is Professor Pyg. Pyg has his own strange meaning to the word “perfection” which he forces upon his victims by bonding doll faces onto their own face in gruesome fashion. Then by some form of surgery or simple lobotomizing, Pyg turns his victims into his own personal soldier, known as a Dollotron. I think it would be far the creepiest aspect of the games yet when Batman is being swarmed by groups of hideously transformed Dollotrons who want nothing more than to present the Dark Knight to their master for “surgery”.

Garfield Lynns would also be a welcome addition to the game and provide Batman with an interesting boss fight. It’s one thing fighting Mr. Freeze on the ground with his freeze ray assailing you at every turn, but imagine a foe flying above and trying to incinerate you! Lynns would of course not have much story depth to him, but after being featured on the front page of a Gotham newspaper in Arkham Aslyum I think it’s time for the resident pyromaniac to be set loose upon our gaming systems.

In terms of crime boss villains such as Two Face and Penguin, I think that the Great White Shark Warren White would be a great addition. The once meek Warren White underwent a terrible transformation during his time in Arkham Asylum that turned him into the hideous, hardened crime boss that he is in the comics. White was once on top in the Gotham underworld in the comic book continuity and he would work great in the next game.

I envision all of the established crime syndicates to show up in the next game actually including the Maroni and Falcone crime families and the return of Two Face, Penguin and Black Mask. Roman Sionis, the Black Mask, in particular had a very brief role in Arkham City which disappointed me greatly. If you’ll remember he was at the very beginning getting the living shit beat out of him by TYGER guards. Unacceptable! Black Mask is one of the most ruthless crime bosses in Gotham and he needs a little more to do than get beat down in the next installment!

Aside from Black Mask, Penguin and Two Face being brought back I have a few other choices of villains that need to make a repeat, two of which were noticeably absent from Arkham City; The first being that of Jonathan Crane, the Scarecrow. After being taken down by Killer Croc in the first game, Crane was not heard from in Arkham City except in a couple of instances. First, there is his mask and some hay laying atop a bridge just outside of Sionis industries.

Then close by on the little barge/boat in the water there is a secret door you can use your cryptographic sequencer to open which reveals a little laboratory of sorts. There’s even a tortured “patient”, containers of cockroaches and a shipping manifest made out to Dr. Crane from Falcone Shipping. The place is just straight up creepy. I suppose this means that our friend the Scarecrow is alive and well and Batman will have to stop him again sooner or later. I say later in the next video game.

Killer Croc was another who was missing from the game. You can have a little confrontation with him in the sewer after facing off with Ra’s Al’ Ghul but nothing beyond that. In the third game I want to see Killer Croc as a boss or someone’s enforcer. I enjoyed running from him in the sewers of Arkham Asylum but a head on fight would be most excellent.

Bane would be another foe worth running into again, this time as a head on enemy again and not a pseudo ally. This will more than likely happen depending mostly on the success of his character in the Dark Knight Rises which is already bound to be a box office smash hit. It would be nice if they use him a little better than just the Solomon Grundy type brute in the next game, maybe as a more calculating foe as he was in the Knightfall arc of the Batman comics.

It wouldn’t hurt to see Ivy return either, just because I’ve always had a thing for women with green skin who dress in skimpy prison clothes. I liked her small role in Arkham City but I think they could use her a little more somehow in the third game. Another huge favortite of mine would also be Clayface, who was my favorite rogue to show up in Arkham City. You know they’ll be doing something with him after he fell into the Lazarus Pit; perhaps he’ll return with some new mutation that will make him more dangerous than before.

On the bat family side of things I wouldn’t mind seeing more of Batman’s allies as playable characters in the third game. It was excellent being able to switch between Batman and Catwoman in Arkham City, and it was awesome to kick ass in the challenge modes with Robin and Nightwing. Hopefully in the third game it will allow you to switch between all of the characters to perform different missions throughout Gotham City. And I may go completely ballistic if the map is bigger than ever before and you are not allowed to use the batmobile. Vehicles seems like the next logical step in the franchise. It would be like Grand Theft Auto: Gotham City.

Well, that’s about all I have for now. Have I forgotten anything that needs to be in the next Arkham game? Locations, characters or otherwise? It’s probably a long way off from now but who knows, Rocksteady might be moving their asses off on this red hot franchise to follow up the release of the Dark Knight Rises.

Holy Jon Snow! Kit Harrington Soon to be King Arthur

If any of you Game of Thrones fans had a dream grudge match envisioned of who would win in a fight between Jon Snow and Robb Stark (Not that it would have happened in the books) then I hate to tell you that Jon Snow would win. Well, if it were between the actors who play those characters on the show… and they were dueling over movie roles…. With only their acting skills…. Ah forget it. Either way, Kit Harrington who plays Jon Snow on the Game of Thrones has beat out Robb Stark actor Richard Madden (amongst others) for the role of King Arthur in an upcoming movie about said King and Sir Lancelot. Thanks to IGN for the info.

Robb Stark and Jon Snow

I say good for Kit Harrington, but is anyone out there really psyched for another re-imagining of the Arthur story? We’ve had the abysmal Clive Owen-Arthur movie, and the so-so Camelot show that was recently and shockingly canceled by Starz. Now this version of the Arthur tale is said to be a contemporary, modern day retelling of the Arthur story….. That sounds very unappealing to me. Will it be some sort of chick flick? If so why do you need someone like Harrington? Why not Matthew McConaughey or Josh Duhamel for a lame duty such as that? Personally I hope it’s a modern day retelling where there is a love triangle between Arthur, Lancelot and Guinevere that ends in a thrilling 30 minute sword fight through the streets of London. Part of which occurs on the roof of a moving double decker bus.

Either way, good for Kit Harrington and if it is destined to suck we won’t have to worry about it until March of 2013.

In Case You Missed It Review: Green Lantern

I’m a Green Lantern fan. I’m not one of those from the beginning Lantern fans, I’m talking the Geoff Johns era Lantern fan. That would probably make a whole bunch of geeks out there vomit in revulsion because they don’t like the Geoff Johns era because it made Green Lantern relevant after they blindly followed his lameness throughout the decades before. But that’s neither here nor there, as a Lantern fan (a pretty big one in my opinion) I felt it only proper that I review the recent Ryan Reynolds starring film. I was very excited after the second trailer came out for the flick, but once I missed it the first week in theaters the critics and my colleague Dr. Kronner had already done the damage. The movie was lambasted as a piece of crap that failed at every turn. Dr. Kronner had a more reasonable assessment but he stopped short of calling it awesome or even good. Well I’ve watched the Blu-Ray disc this very night and let me tell you: This movie sucks major arse, especially if you’re a Green Lantern fan. Casual movie goers would enjoy it and that’s about it, which explains it’s heartless box office performance.

*SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY*

So for those of you who do not know, the movie is about an ancient species of beings called the Guardians who have harnessed the green energy of will power and created an intergalactic force of peacekeepers to maintain justice throughout the space sectors of the galaxy. The peacekeepers wear rings imbued with the green energy of will power and the wearer can make any construct they can imagine to serve and protect those in need. Sounds great right? Yes, in theory it does and in the comics it is awesome but this movie really just falls flat and makes the mistake of spending far too much time on Earth and not in the galaxy showing us what the Lanterns can do.

Ryan Reynolds as Hal Jordan I could live with. He was wise cracking and humorous at times but nothing too over the top for Mr. “I like to wear no shirt” Reynolds. But as for the costume he wore, in particular the mask, I found myself laughing out loud at it in certain scenes. I still can’t figure out if the laughter was a confused laughter because I should have been crying at what a joke they had made of the Green Lantern Hal Jordan.

Hurr Durr Durr

It’s a shame because the movie did have some potential in many ways. The scenes on Oa and elsewhere in the galaxy were very well done and made up the best parts of the movie. As I said before there just wasn’t enough time allotted to said parts. Kilowog, Tomar Re, Sinestro and the Guardians all looked fantastic as well. Mark Strong did a fine job as the veteran lantern Sinestro who starts off as a mentor to Hal Jordan before eventually turning into his greatest nemesis. The one issue I had was with Parallax and it was not because they changed up his origin and character quite a bit. It was because he basically looked like a squirming pile of burning dog shit. Watch the movie if you want to see what that might look like on screen.

Instead of more Oa and space action we are served with a generic romance between Hal Jordan and fellow pilot Carol Ferris, played by Blake Lively. Lively is definitely a very, very hot slice of pizza but she really doesn’t have much of an onscreen presence. However, that doesn’t mean I’m against a sequel where there is a possibility of her being in the uniform of a Star Sapphire.

Blake Lively would look great.

The other bit of Earth story we get is the completely pointless one of Hector Hammond, played by Peter Sarsgaard. Hector is a childhood friend of Carol and Hal who is more of a bookworm who gains telekinetic powers from a connection with Parallax; this again is for no good reason other than to have someone for Hal to fight on Earth. I give props to DC and the studio for making Hammond, a lesser known Lantern foe the main villain besides Parallax to face off against Hal, but unfortunately most of the scenes with him made me laugh. And I assure you that was not their intent.

Huh huh… I farted.

His gargantuan cranium looked sillier than it does in the comics and he had a propensity for screaming about anything and everything that brought an amused smile to my face. This would be the sort of smile I get when I see a drunken idiot in a bar trying to fight everyone in sight and making a complete ass of themselves. Epic fail Mr. Hammond. Epic fail. But seriously big ups to the literal roast of Tim Robbins, because that was entertaining for about ten seconds.

Holy Smokes!

Overall I have to give the movie a 2 out of 5 bears. It would have been a 1 out of 5, but since Ms. Lively was looking so superbly elegant in the movie I’ll bump it up. The other point would be for the scenes not taking place on Earth because they looked pretty, especially on Blu-Ray.

Otherwise the movie just didn’t have good enough pacing or anything on Earth worthy enough to care about. Hal’s fear wasn’t touched upon nearly enough except in a silly flashback seen from viewpoints of footage we had seen about fifteen minutes previously and a couple parts that took him two seconds to decide “I’m not afraid. Let’s party”.

I’ loooooooove screamin’!

A sequel is definitely most welcome, granted they work on focusing it more in the galaxy at large instead of boring old Earth. With Sinestro utilizing the yellow ring of fear at the end that would make for a good set up for a third film if he is exiled from the Green Lantern Corps by the end of the second movie. And if they need a villain that doesn’t suck as hard as Hector Hammond for the sequel I suggest they use Artrocitus and his Red Lanterns due to his history with the Guardians… and because they are totally bad ass.

The Walking Dead: Season 2, Episode 6 – “Secrets”

In the beginning of this episode, Carl and Lori are feeding the chickens on Hershel’s farm. The mother chicken is missing, and we see Patricia feed the live hen to the walkers being kept in Hershel’s hayloft. Oh yes… I have been anticipating this episode for what has been the longest week of waiting ever! Carl steals a gun and tells Shane that he wants to learn to shoot. It took a lot of convincing for Lori, but she and Rick allowed Carl to go learn to shoot guns with Shane. At shooting practice with the group, Andrea wows Rick and Shane with her target skills.

FYI: Never tell Glenn a secret. He told Dale about the walkers in the barn and that Lori is pregnant. Dale confronted Hershel about the walkers in his barn. He explained that the atrocities he saw were men killing sick men, whether they were walkers or not. Also, that Hershel has family members in the barn who are walkers. Dale confronts Lori about her pregnancy. He also brought up the Shane situation, which no one has really brought up since the first season. Lori says that she is living off of memories of joy. She also says that Carl probably has no memories of joy left, and that the baby would have none.

Glenn is very easily one of my favorite characters. He told Lori that if she needed anything at all he would help her, since she hasn’t told Rick. He is making a trip into town for her. He seems to be the only character who is not yet jaded by what is going on around them. While he and Maggie are in the drug store in town, Glenn has to brutally kill a walker who is after Maggie.When Glenn and Maggie get back to Hershel’s farm, Maggie screams at Lori. Lori apparently asked Glenn to get her morning after pills, or “abortion pills”. Maggie also tells Glenn that he is walker bait, and she can’t take him turning into one of them.

Continue reading The Walking Dead: Season 2, Episode 6 – “Secrets”

Grizzly Album Review: “Mylo Xyloto” by Coldplay

2011 has been a pretty good year for follow-up albums. Jay-Z and Kanye West dropped Watch The Throne to both critical and commercial success, as did Radiohead with their new LP King of Limbs. Now, later in the year, Coldplay is back with their follow-up to Viva La Vida. I’m not sure what the title means, but f*** it. It’s called Mylo Xyloto. Literally nobody knows what it means, not even the band knows. They said that naming this album was akin to “naming a child”, and that they thought it sounded cool. More power to them.

Alternate Cover…. Whammy.

All meaningless titles aside, Mylo Xyloto is a revelation in that this really is Coldplay’s best album. In fact, since the release of their 2005 dud X&Y, they’ve been doing nothing but rising to the top once again. Viva La Vida marked the beginning of their “edgy” rock band stage, and now Mylo Xyloto cements their status as one of the 2000s greatest bands.

A few years back, Coldplay was named as the number one band to make you fall asleep. Now they’re topping the “Party Hits” charts on Pandora and Music Choice. How did this transformation occur, you might ask? Well, it all started in 2008 when Coldplay discovered upbeat rock/pop hits. Now, you might be saying, “Wait a second there, Clocks is an upbeat rock/pop song!” My response? I call bullshit. You all know that there’s been one night in your life when you’ve fallen asleep to that song. Go ahead, admit, I’ll give you a second.

After a 43 second interlude entitled “Mylo Xyloto” the album begins with the track, “Hurts Like Heaven”. Instantly we’re propelled into radio friendly hits that remind us why we even started listening to Coldplay in the first place, another thing that Mylo Xyloto is frighteningly good at, putting the listener in a good mood. No matter what’s bothering you, Mylo Xyloto is guaranteed to make things feel at least a little better. As great as the fast songs on, Mylo Xyloto takes time to stop and smell the roses on tracks like “U.F.O” and “Up in Flames” only to once again shoot us back into the glorious joy dancing we were just doing.

If Mylo Xyloto does anything right, it’s a nice escape from a dark world. But it also takes a band that most critics thought were done being catchy, and makes them even catchier than ever before. Old fans will not be invited, and new fans are welcomed with open arms.

Best Track: Paradise

4/5 Bears

In Case You Missed It: Bombay Beach

My film teacher once told me that when you film ordinary things like a morning commute or a trip to the store, it can really come off as pure art if done correctly. This is something I’ve debated for a long time, mostly with myself in my many hours alone. Can something as bland or normal as a car ride truly transcend into beauty simply by the addition of a lens? It seems illogical at first, in my opinion. What’s the difference between staring at a broken bottle, and then staring a photo of a broken bottle?

Bombay Beach explores many things, all quite successfully I might add. Following the lives of three separate people, a rambunctious child, being given copious amounts of behavioral drugs, named Benny, an aspiring NFL player nicknamed CeeJay, and a young-at-heart cigarette bootlegger nicknamed Red. The three, as different as they may be (Benny is a young child, CeeJay is a black teenager, and Red is a senior citizen), have very similar situations in life, and in a in a lot of ways, too. Twice CPS, due to neglect and unfit living conditions, has taken Benny away from his parents. CeeJay is in love with a girl that’s in a mentally abusive relationship with another boy, and Red is approaching senility, requiring medical care after having a mini-stroke.

The genius in Bombay Beach resides in the intriguing characters, expert directing, and an extremely bizarre genre. Bombay Beach may be the first film that I can label as a DocuDrama Musical. Directed by music video director, Alma Har’el, the film contains some well-choreographed dances, as well as some scenes that are basically music videos for Beirut and Bob Dylan, who composed most of the soundtrack. Now, you might be thinking, “This is a lot to do in a mere 80 minutes. Three plots, dance sequences, and music videos?!” Well, yes, it does seem like a lot, but somehow the filmmakers, and especially the editors, constructed a beautifully shot documentary that plays as if it were a scripted feature film.

The characters are neither protagonists nor antagonists. They’re people. They curse and drink and smoke just like almost everyone else does. I don’t think the director intended for the audience to think that these families were bad people, but a part of me also thinks that they weren’t necessarily intended to be what we define as “good” people either. They just are who they are, and we get to be the fly on the wall in their lives.

The plots are somewhat loose, and don’t necessarily make the film what it is, but they’re there, even if they’re extremely scarce. The images as I’ve mentioned are gorgeous, while others are very disturbing, including a brief shot of the rotting corpse of an abandoned dog. All of these components combined make Bombay Beach a must watch for any film-lover. Not only is it the most inventive documentary of the year, it’s also the most thought provoking. These families that live in the poorest town in Southern California have stories and lives and issues to deal with, too. We tend to forget about people like this. We write them off as white trash and low lives, but there’s always more to the story than we give credit. Bombay Beach isn’t a perfect film, but then again, neither are the people in it, which is what makes it so relatable, and at the same time so new.

4/5 Bears