Many people last week proclaimed Battle of the Bastards the greatest episode Game of Thrones had ever delivered – there is an argument to be made for The Winds of Winter holding that title.
Season Six spoilers to follow – duh.
You’re in the great game now. And the great game is terrifying.
Spoilers Inbound for events taking place between episodes 1.01 and 6.09 – obviously.
If I fall, don’t bring me back.
If you haven’t watched episode 6.04, there are spoilers to follow – obviously.
Let’s go ahead and ignore the words “only two episodes left” and just enjoy this promo for episode 9 of Game of Thrones, “The Rains of Castamere”.
I’ll just say it – Arya is perhaps one of my favorite people on the planet. That chick does not play around. Sure Daenerys is obviously amazing but she’s got a family history going for her, not to mention the obvious dragon benefit, but Arya? Girlfriend has been kicking ass and taking names seemingly from the time she popped out of the birth canal and doing so in very challenging situations. Of course she’s going to stand up to Hound and threaten him, just another day for the young Stark.
Not only is the number of episodes left sad news, but there’s also a week without our beloved Westeros inhabitants thanks to the Memorial Day weekend. While the true intention of Memorial Day is to remember those men and women who have died in service to this country, we all know that it’s the start of summer and really just a reason for people to stand around in backyards and drink around a grill.
Of course the obvious choice for a drinking song to go along with this promo would be The Rains of Castamere itself!
Well that’s all I’ve got this week. Make sure you check back tomorrow for our review of tonight’s episode and I’ll see you next time Game of Thrones fans!
Here we are in the second half of the third season of Game Of Thrones, and for those who haven’t read the books, I’d imagine things are getting frustrating when it comes to pacing. Granted not every episode could be the tour de force that was episode 3.04 “And Now His Watch Is Ended” aka “The Badass Episode With Dragons & Daenerys F***ing S*** UP” as most of my non book reading friends refer to it. Unfortunately with a series that has a cast of dozens, there has to be room made for the many storylines to all come together in lots of interesting ways. The most difficult thing for me, is trying to pinpoint what exactly is new to the story, adapted differently, or I’m just plain forgetting. That all being said, while “The Climb” wasn’t the most riveting episode in terms of plot advancement, it did well to establish important character beats that will pay off later. Or they should, unless they’re changed. Or done differently.
Regardless of the changes, the episode did a good job of having all the concurrent stories touched on and expanded in interesting ways. We started off with Samwell and Gilly escaping off into the Gods know where trying to save her baby who had the audacity to be born a boy, followed quickly by Meera Reed trading some barbs with Osha about skinning rabbits. (Women!) Ostensibly they’re all working together to follow the Three Eyed Crow’s dream, who’s guiding them along a vague and unknowable path of certain divine and/or fortuitous significance, that even I’m not sure of. I don’t even think they’ve really gotten around to what they’re really after just yet, even in the books. Then again I’m impossibly stupid sometimes.
Beyond The Wall we got to see Jon Snow and Ygritte finally put into words their bond with each other, as well as her admission of knowledge that she figured out he’s still doing the double agent thing for The Night’s Watch. Of course, love blinds all to duty, honor or loyalty, and she makes a pretty reasonable argument as to him staying loyal to her only, by threatening to cut off his Johnson and wear it around her neck if he betrays her. Generally when women tell me that, I run the hell away, or I’m super turned on and maybe that’s the reason why all of my relationships are horrific meltdowns of apocalyptic emotional proportion?
Anyhow! Afterward, there’s a tense scene between Lady Melisandre and Thoros who discuss in Valyrian their agendas to the Lord of Light. We see Melisandre shaken for the first time, as she meets 6-times resurrected Lord Beric, and she proclaims it’s not possible. Which was interesting, because I’m positive Melisandre didn’t have this interaction in the book. Her role is beefed up here, and she’s portrayed a bit more humanely, as opposed to the starkly conniving, mysterious and witchy woman she is in the novels. Then they sell poor Gendry for gold to her. Because she needs nubile boys to make armor for her or something. I mean, sure yeah he’s technically the son of Rob Baratheon, but nobody really cares about King Rob anymore, and the only guy who did had his head chopped off. What? Too soon?
Then back with Theon, which is the one part of the show that’s entirely, wholly new, and subsequently to me is the most interesting. We’re just as curious as he is as to why Simon from Misfits torturing him so horribly, (I mean I have an idea, but no spoilers), or even who he is and where they even are. Theon is then forced to play a horrible game of “Guess who I am, where we are, and what’s going on, or else I slowly rip the skin off your fingers!”, which is the worst f***ing game in the world, probably. Right after all team sports. YEAH THAT’S RIGHT, I’M CALLING YOU OUT ALL SPORTS FANS! SUCK IT!
Source: Ha, Never Again
Well eventually Theon loses, and we’re back to seeing Jaime and Brienne making a deal with Lord Roose Bolton, a man who’ll become very important soon, in ways I won’t ruin for you. We learn that poor Brienne won’t be let go along with Jaime, and Jaime’s defense of her slowly clinches Jaime’s eventual face-turn as an anti-hero. Then we get to see Lord Tywin and Lady Olenna Tyrell exchange snarky quips, the way old people do. I don’t know if it was just me, but if they were both about 30 years younger I have a feeling they would have totally boned right on that table. Right? Nobody but me got that?
Okay then. Some more rumination on by the Lannisters, this time both Tyrion and Cercei, on their arranged marriage woes, then Tyrion’s awkward revelation to poor Sansa Stark that she now has to marry him. Which I guess is a downgrade from marrying a super hunky gayboy, but personally I think Tyrion is much better company. All Loras has going for him is his knighthood, his looks, and his skills with a “sword”, as Lady Olenna would put it. Then Sansa cries because truly there is no fate worse than marrying a midget. Or something about her whole life being controlled by others, never being able to hang onto any semblance of happiness, and having every bit of hope snatched away from her. Either or.
Back at the wall, Snow and Co. are climbing it slowly, on the way to make their attack against Castle Black. Eventually the ice cracks and makes a big avalanche, nearly taking out Snow and Ygritte, who manage to save themselves in the nick of time right before their untrustworthy compatriot cut them loose. Then they climb on top, hug and share the scenic view of the land beyond the wall. All romantic and s**t. The end.
Like I said earlier, as a fan of the books it’s difficult to reconcile what I’m thinking is new, and what I’m just not remembering. I read the book sometime last year, and while I know the broad strokes of the story, watching episodes like these is still interesting if only for the character building. Fans of the show only may find the pacing incongruent with the last two seasons, but that’s only because SO MANY THINGS happen in A Storm Of Swords we’re really only about 1/4 of the way through the book, and I have a firm idea in mind exactly what the season finale will be. So will any reader of the books, and waiting for that moment to happen is as anxious and as exciting as watching the show and seeing all the new developments, thematic changes, and straight up plot changes. It’s still the same story overall, but episodes like this highlight how the little scenes in a novel can translate into other things entirely, simply by the nature of the story becoming a visual medium. So yeah, it wasn’t the most important episode in relation to the plot of the others in the show, but character development, foreshadowing, and of course those awfully great added torturing scenes with Theon, keep the whole thing fresh and interesting for folks like me, who are silently waiting everyone else to have their damn socks blown off.
If you’re complaining about the story not moving fast enough right now, stick with it. Believe you me, when your socks are flying around the damned room in circles and your balls or ovaries are exploding or whatever, you’ll thank me. Oh how you’ll thank me.
Check out the promo for next the next episode, ‘The Bear and the Maiden Fair‘ now!
[Editor’s Note – I thought this was one of the best episodes of the whole show. The scene between Littlefinger and the Spider at the end, as well as the one with Tywin and Lady Olenna were both about as good as you’ll see. I have no problem with the pacing. That is all.]
So you’ve watched “The Climb” and now are wondering “what is next?!?!?”, well rest easy because we’ve got your episode 7, “The Bear and the Maiden Fair” promo for you right now.
Outside of everything else in that promo, I think we all know that the most important thing is… Daenerys!!! We go a week without her and the withdrawal symptoms are too much. Shaking, crying, wondering how you have wronged the universe and why the universe felt that a week without Khaleesi of the Dothraki is an appropriate punishment. Thankfully, that will all disappear next week with “The Bear and the Maiden Fair”.
In the meantime, let’s amuse ourselves with Game of Thrones re-imagined.
– as aired in the mid-90’s
– as popular 90’s sitcom, Seinfeld
– as an 16 bit RPG
– as the Simpsons opening
I love things like that. Almost as I love Zach Galifianakis in a dragon costume to play ‘Game of Game of Thrones’ on this week’s SNL!
Make sure to check out our review of season 3, episode 6 – “The Climb” and I’ll see you back here next week with a new promo and more Game of Thrones fun from around the internet!
Obviously everyone wants to talk about the hot tub scene that just went down in the latest episode of Game of Thrones, Kissed By Fire, so naturally, we here at Grizzly Bomb want to congratulate Jon Snow on getting his. He broke the vows of the Watch and definitely got it on with Ygritte, in a fancy romantic hot spring no less. I’m sure all those people who wanted them to hook up are happy, as are those that have been complaining about a lack of nudity because you definitely got it tonight. But there’s still a lot that happened with Robb Stark, the Kingslayer, Arya and Stannis that we should delve into. Overall, it was a good episode, although it’s impossible to match the epicness that happened during ‘And Now His Watch Is Ended’, it still sets the stage for the rest of the season. Also, did you know this means we’re already halfway through the season? Damn you Game of Thrones for your short seasons and year of waiting for your awesomeness.
It is a truly sweet moment between Ygritte and Jon Snow. Yeah, it starts off with pretty much two horny kids and the magical powers that apparently virgins have in satisfying their women (see: Podrick), but it gets to a sweet moment where they jump into the hot spring and she declares that she just never wants to leave, but alas, there’s a Wall to storm. In earlier scenes the Wildlings have been grilling Jon about the defenses to make sure that he’s telling the truth, and that they don’t get ambushed themselves. So there’s no chance that the hot tub loving will last. It’s Game of Thrones after all, there are people that need to be killed and betrayed and the such. Happiness doesn’t last in Westeros for long. (See: umm, every episode before this)
This also happened too by the way. We got to see the trial by combat between Beric and The Hound and it definitely started off with theatrics courtesy of the Lord of Light. The deity would help light the sword on fire, but not so much with the end result of the fight. The Hound would overwhelm Beric and almost cut him in half. Arya was not a happy camper with that and tried to make a run at The Hound while he was down but was held back by Gendry.
Of course, what caught Arya off guard was Beric rising after a quick prayer, without his deadly injury and a little pissed at himself. It was a cool fight regardless but we got to see that there’s some crazy stuff that surrounds the Lord of Light. We would later learn that Beric has been brought back from the dead no less than 6 times, but loses a bit of himself each and every time. Which makes sense considering you’ve been maimed, blinded, stabbed hanged, and everything else under the sun. Regardless, Arya will be taken to Riverrun as a “guest” in exchange for gold to Robb Stark. Gendry has decided to stay and be a smith to these wonderful people. Of course that upsets Arya because while she dropped the dead weight of Hot Pie, she wants Gendry to stick around and be a part of her family. Of course, he kinda creeped me out when he mentioned that it wouldn’t be as family, it’d be as ‘milady’. We’ll just let that settle for a bit.
Courtesy of Amy-Williams
We check in at Riverrun with Robb Stark and he’s pissed off because one of his bannermen, Karstark, craves justice for his sons that were murdered by the Kingslayer last season, and takes out the Lannister boys that were in captivity. Rob brings the perpetrators in front of him and orders the men hanged, but for Karstark to be thrown in the dungeon. Karstark knows Robb won’t do anything but scold him and slap his wrist and lets him know about it. His mother, uncle, and wife plead with him to exercise caution when dealing with him because he still holds a large portion of the remaining army and the Lannisters will not stop. Naturally, Robb Stark loves being told what to do so he decides to behead him. Great performance by Richard Madden in the episode as Robb Stark because he seems overwhelmed and overburdened by everything this episode and shows it greatly, especially after slaying the traitor as he walks away, anger still seething in him wishing he didn’t have to make decisions anymore. Of course, in the aftermath, he realizes his error in judgment and has to plan his way out of it. Of course, he can’t attack King’s Landing, he can’t go back to Winterfell, so he thinks, ‘Hey, let me take their home and hit them where it hurts at Casterly Rock’. Only thing he needs is a bigger army and an ally. Hey, House Frey hasn’t sided with anyone! Oh wait, you were supposed to marry his daughter. That didn’t go so well. Foreshadowing? Hmm…
Back at Dragonstone, we get an update from Stannis as he feels abandoned by his mistress and goes to his wife all lonely and depressed. He later confesses to her about cheating with his wizard mistress but apparently she already knows. She’s somewhat crazy herself and knows that she let him down as well because there are no boy heirs and she can’t deliver on that. Of course, she has a daily reminder of her failure so I can understand why she’s a bit…off. Let’s face it, if I went to my wife and said, ‘hey, that red-head I’ve been hanging out with, that’s happening’ I would’ve been stabbed to death in the middle of that sentence. But if you’re surrounded by your stillborn children, then you tend to just be a giant shell of yourself.
Of course, we also get the reveal that he does, in fact, have a daughter. Granted, he keeps her locked up because she has a disfigured face and not because she is Rapunzel. Stannis, a gentleman amongst gentlemen. Shireen is just happy to see him after all this time. The girl asks about Ser Davos, but Stannis explains to her that she won’t be seeing Davos anytime soon. Of course, those curious kids always want to know what’s up with that because she wants the gift he promised her from King’s Landing. He then decides to break her heart and tell her that he’s been locked up as a traitor to forget about him. Davos is her only friend so obviously this devastates her and Stannis further cements his legacy as man of the year. Naturally, this doesn’t stop Shireen from sneaking down to the dungeon to hang out with her friend Davos. He tries to shoo her away but to no avail. Girl just wants to hang and have pajama parties and brought him a book. Unfortunately, he can’t read so she offers to teach him and we get a nice little “Awwwww…” exchange.
Let’s travel to King’s Landing where Grandmother Tyrell meets with Tyrion and they have a great exchange about the wedding bill as he tries to trim costs and she just completely matches him word for word. He is taken aback that someone could match him or even better, that she agreed to split the costs of the royal wedding. Of course, she’s super disappointed she didn’t get Tyrion at his drunken prime and instead gets the glorified accountant. Which was awesome of her to note because it’s absolutely true. We need that Tyrion back. Later, he gets summoned by his father and Cersei is present as a new plot has been devised. Apparently by Sansa Stark being married into the House Tyrell, the key to the north will move to that house. Tywin can’t have that and decides that Tyrion will get to marry Sansa, much to his disbelief. He feels she needs to break away and be rid of their family because of her treatment from Joffrey amongst others. Of course, this entertains Cersei until some more family duty comes down on her and Tywin says she will marry into the House Tyrell and relieve him of the disgrace that his children has brought on to his family. Maybe we can take away the father of the year award from Stannis because it totally belongs to Tywin. The below pic sums of the kids feelings. Sucks to be them.
Speaking of the Lannisters, we also get an update from Jamie and Brienne as they get dropped off in Harrenhal. Jamie needs treatment on his rotting flesh wound and wants to feel the pain. Granted, the person operating him lost in license due to him freelancing with experiments so maybe Jamie will come out with the hook hand like Buster Bluth. Which would be awesome but it doesn’t happen unfortunately. Brienne is then treated to another hot tub bath and Jamie decides to join her post surgery. It’s an interesting contrasting scene between the two of them and the other hot tub scene with Jon Snow and Ygritte. Brienne obviously doesn’t want his stubby hand in the water with her. Obviously, Jamie likes to push buttons and just takes a dip in regardless. Of course, he goads her by bringing up her failure to protect him and Renly and she is offended and stands up to him. From them on, stuff gets real. He breaks down and reveals to truth behind his name and that shame her carries every time it is uttered by others. It’s really a heart felt confession and a small crack into his mind. The Mad King wouldn’t surrender was going to destroy the city from within and all the citizens inside with wildfire. Jamie had no choice but to slay the Mad King. When Ned Stark arrived, he kept his mouth shut because as Lannister must remain proud. He then collapses and then tells Brienne to call him by his real name. Really a great moment that really makes you question what Jamie is going through and how his mind works. I mean, he’s still a dick but still.
Again, a lot happened in this episode but overall it was great one. Definitely got to see some happiness seep in as well as more and more plot development that will deliver a heckuva finale. Oh Game of Thrones, is there anything you can’t do? Short of having Don Draper or the crew from The Walking Dead show up and just confuse the hell out of people. But man, how cool would that be?
Oooooh boy was there a lot of bare backside this week! Let’s take a moment and give it up for Jon Snow…
Good on ya boy!
Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s look at the upcoming episode 6, ‘The Climb’.
Oh Jon Snow, what is rule number one of heights? You don’t look down! Especially while scaling a very, very, very high wall of ice.
Aack! I don’t even have an issue with heights but hooboy that is terrifying looking. It also looks like Theon Greyjoy makes a return after this week’s absence.
There is sadness with this episode though, and that would be the fact that we are past the halfway mark.
Thankfully the internet provides such things to keep us going through these times of great loss, and even anticipation of great loss. How about a collection of various Game of Thrones theme music? If nothing else, it might give you a new appreciation for carillon bells!
Hope you find something you like in all those, there’s a little something for everyone!
There has been much to talk about in HBO’s Game of Thrones since our last review on May 7.
Winterfell: In episode 7, “A Man Without Honor”, Osha, the wildling who had in the previous episode slept with Prince Theon Greyjoy, had fled Winterfell. She had gone with Bran, Rickon, and Hodor. He can’t be new to women not wanting to wake up to him. He’s god awful. Ignoring the concerns expressed by Maester Luwin, Prince Theon and his men set out to find the escaped wildling and boys. He takes the dogs to find the trail, but they lose it near the farm. However, when a walnut-shell is discovered, they realize that the boys must have gone through the farm. Ludwin goes back to Winterfell. When Prince Theon returns to winterfell with his men, he reveals two young charred dead bodies, supposed to be bran and Rickon. when the episode ended, I was sure that these two boys were not Bran and Rickon. They made that pretty obvious. In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, after all messenger ravens are sentenced to death by Prince Theon Greyjoy so that the death of the two Stark boys will remain unknown by anyone outside of Winterfell, his sister Yara shows up. She reveals that she is there to take her brother home, because his killing the Stark boys will bring war of the North. He, of course, doesn’t want to seem cowardly and absolutely refuses to go with her. When Maester Luwin catches Osha taking bread into the crypts right there in Winterfell, he follows her. He notices that Bran and Rickon are alive, and are with her. Osha explains that they came back to Winterfell while Prince Theon and his men were searching for them, and hid in the crypts. The charred bodies were of the two orphan farm boys. I am wondering if they will be discovered. I am a big fan of Bran, and Osha has girl balls.
Beyond the Wall: In episode 7, “A Man Without Honor”, Jon Snow is continuing to hold his prisoner Ygritte on a chain while looking for the other men who were with him. Ygritte uses her women’s intuition to figure out Jon has never had sex. She also finds out that he has taken to celibacy for his job. This is hilarious. She is absolutely dumbfounded by the thought of never having sex. Ygritte is basically throwing herself at Jon, but he stick with his vow of celibacy and refuses her advances. The Wildling even tried to explain to Jon how much better life is as one of her own, and how much happier he could be. While crossing a difficult patch of land, Ygritte escapes her capture, and runs off. Jon could not find her, but she gets his attention, and surrounding her were a large group of Wildlings. In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, Jon Snow escapes death with the help of his former prisoner Ygritte. The Wildlings leader, Rattleshirt, wants Jon dead, but she explains that Mance Rayder will surely like to meet Eddard Stark’s bastard. Qhorin Halfhand was captured by the Wildlings as well, and plots with Jon Snow to find out Mance’s Army’s plans. Sam and Grenn also find something extraordinary buried in the snow. In an old Night Watch man’s cloak, there was a horn and dragonglass weapons.
Across The Narrow Sea: In episode 7, “A Man Without Honor”, Daenerys has yet to get her dragons back. Ser Jorah Mormont, after returning from his search for a ship, vows to find them. At a meeting of the thirteen, Pyat Pree admits that the dragons are in the House of the Undying. Pree multiplies himself and kills every one of the thirteen. Daenerys immediately runs out with Mormont and Kovarro. In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, Ser Jorah Mormont explains to Daenerys that she needs to leave Qarth immediately. Daenerys refuses to leave without her dragons. She explains that they are her children. She asks to be taken to the House of the Undying. The fact that episode 9 did not show Daenerys was the only thing about that episode that I did not like. I want to see more dragons!
The Westerlands: In episode 7, “A Man Without Honor”, Alton Lannister tells King Robb of the negative response to his peace terms brought to Queen Cersei. Robb puts Alton in with Ser Jaime Lannister while a prison is constructed for him. After a bit, Jaime kills Alton and when the guard inspects the situation, he is killed as well. Jaime does escape, but is shortly after captured and brought back by Brienne.
Catelyn, after being repeatedly insulted by Jaime, asks for Brienne’s sword. I wished she would kill him, but she had other plans. King Robb takes Lady Talisa with him to the Crag to get more medical supplies for his wounded men. In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, when King Robb and Talisa come back after their trip to the Crag, Robb is told of Jaime’s escape. Since his mother was responsible, Robb had Catelyn placed under guard. Lord Roose Bolton approaches Robb with the idea to have his son, a bastard, retake Winterfell for him to rid them of Prince Theon. King Robb agrees. After this, Talisa and Robb have a conversation about their lives, and Robb explains that he is promised to another woman because he and his men had to cross a bridge. He admits that he does not want to be with the other woman, and Talisa says that she doesn’t want him to either. Then occurs the most attractive of the show’s sexual encounters.
Harrenhal: In episode 7, “A Man Without Honor”, Lord Tywin Lannister has yet to find out Amory Lorch’s killer, and orders Ser Gregor Clegane to figure it out. After inviting Arya to eat with him, they discuss his legacy, as well as the history of Aegon, and Tywin is surprised about her knowledge. He proclaims that she is surely high-born. Arya has done an amazing job of keeping her identity a secret. I did wonder if Petyr Baelish noticed her. In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, Lord Tywin Lannister decides to go after King Robb’s army while they are distracted with Greyjoy in Winterfell, and leaves Ser Gregor Cleganein command. Arya is owed 3 kills by Jaqen H’ghar, and has only used 2. She attempts to use the third on Tywin before he leaves to attack her brother’s army, but it was too late. She asks Jaqen if he can help her and her friends escape instead of her third kill. He agrees, and murders the entire night’s watch so that they can escape unseen.
Baratheon Fleet: In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, Davos Seaworth and Lord Stannis Baratheon reminisce about the siege of the Baratheon ancestral castle Storm’s End, at which time Stannis almost starved to death holding the castle until Davos arrived with supplies and food. Stannis vows that Davos will be his hand when he takes the Iron Throne.
King’s Landing: In episode 7, “A Man Without Honor”, Sansa becomes a woman unexpectedly. She has begun bleeding, which means she is fit to bear Joffrey’s psychotic towhead children. Shae sees this, and tries to help Sansa hide it. She tells Sansa that she will cut the bloody parts from her sheets, but one of the Queen’s handmaidens shows up and runs to tell the Queen. Shae runs after her and threatens her. Shae is a badass! When Shae gets back to Sansa’s room, she sees that the Hound has seen the sheets as well. Cersei tells Sansa that she will never be able to love Joffrey, so she should just focus on loving her children she will be made to bear. Cersei is confronted by Tyrion about Joffrey’s plan to repel Stannis’s fleet may not work, and she breaks down. she tells him that Joffrey is likely her punishment for committing incest, and admits her children are Jaime’s. In episode 8, “The Prince of Winterfell”, Tyrion explains to Lord Varys that they will fight off Stannis’s fleet with pots of wildfire. Cersei believed that Tyrion plans for Joffrey to be killed in battle, and explains that she has captured his whore he has been hiding. She explains that she is aware that he loves this girl. However, she unknowingly has not captured the right woman, a relief to Tyrion. Although Tyrion is skeptical of there being real dragons, he is told of Daenerys Targaryen and her “children”. He decides that he will put that on the back-burner, since there is so much else going on.
In the last episode, 9, “Blackwater”, the entire episode was focused on one story, the first time this has happened in the series’ history. Lord Stannis Baratheon’s fleet is lead into Blackwater Bay by Ser Davos Seaworth. While this is happening, Grand Maester Pycelle gives Cersei a powerful poison. She plans to use this on her family, if Stannis attempts to kill them. Bronn, one of my favorite characters, is not well liked by the Hound, and they almost throw down. Before the gloves come off, however, the bells ring which lets them know that Stannis’s fleet has been seen. King Joffrey, overly confident, and unaware of the very real pain he could endure, is sure that he will be a noble fighter in the battle. He has a new sword he has comically named “Hearteater”. As the men leave, the women and children are gathered in a room guarded by Ser Ilyn Payne, whom Cersei says is there to protect them. She warns Sansa that she will surely be raped and worse if they are taken over by Stannis’s men. At this point, Cersei is getting completely wasted.
Stannis’s fleet notices that one single ship is headed towards them, and there is no one on board. The ship has been rigged with the chemicals to create the wildfire. With the exploding green fire, several men are killed and ships taken down. Stannis being the unrelenting badass that he is, still leads the remaining men to the Mud Gate, being first in line to attack. The Hound, along with many of the Lannister army, are putting up quite a fight, using everything, even rocks, to kill Stannis’s men. The Hound sees a man burning, and retreats. “F*** the King”, he says directly to Tyrion and King Joffrey. Cersei learns of the city being overrun, and orders Lancel to bring Joffrey back into her care. When Joffrey (shocker!) agrees to abandon the battle, Tyrion leads the battle in his stead. Tyrion gives a speech to the men, and tells them he will lead them through the tunnels from Vary’s map, and they will flank the Baratheons. Sansa learns that the man guarding the women and children is really there to kill them all if the city is taken over by the Baratheons. Sansa returns to her quarters, and the Hound is there. He offers to take her with him, and explains that he is fleeing the city. She declines, but then he tried to persuade her. She says “you won’t hurt me”, and her final decision is unclear, although looking at the preview for tonight’s episode, I am assuming that she stays where she is. In battle, Ser Mandon surprisingly attacks Tyrion. His face is slashed side to side. Before Mandon can finish the job, Podrick Payne, Tyrion’s squire, kills him. Tyrion is knocked out, and his current state is unknown. I must say, this brought little tears to my eyes. If Tyrion dies, what will become of this show? Cersei brought Prince Tommen out of the safe room and was about to give him the poison when her father Lord Tywin Lannister burst through the doors and declared “We have won!”.
There are so many questions to be answered that I have a feeling episode 10, the finale, will not be able to get to all of them. For me, this is some of the best writing on Television I have ever seen. There is so much attention to detail with the histories of each family, and I am sure that comes from the books. Game of Thrones has yet to disappoint me… well… disregarding the fact that every time the credits begin to roll, I get disappointed. I am looking forward to tonight’s finale!