All posts by Bree Brouwer

Bree Brouwer is a copywriter and content marketing writer who specializes in the online video industry.

THIS IS NOT a “Fifty Shades of Grey” Review

Today I’m going to give you a brief run-down of an ever-so-popular story that has a lot to do with the color grey.

“I can’t get over how awesome these colors are!”

No, we’re not going to talk about those guys, unfortunately.  The grey I’m referring to is Fifty Shades of Grey.  You may have heard of it.  It’s the best-selling book and series that sexually deprived and cranially vacant women are going bat-shit crazy for.  The book’s also going to be turned into a movie and is supposedly out-selling Harry Potter (all I can say to that is this is a sad, sad world we live in).  It’s livened up marriages and spiced up the bedroom all across the world, and because most women instead of men read it no one dares to call it what it really is.

Let me be clear: I have never read Fifty Shades of Grey, nor do I plan to in the near future.  Or maybe my lifetime. However, because of my intuitive nature I know exactly what it’s about without having to read it, and I’m here to tell you everything.

We start with a girl.  And yes, she’s a girl, not a woman.  Her name’s Anastasia Steele.  She’s really naive, to the point where you aren’t sure she could actually exist in this world without someone having murdered her already because she thought they really were going to give her a ride home.  She’s also incredibly non-sexual; apparently, as readers we are to believe she’s never done anything in that realm at all, with anyone (including herself).  It’s possible she is an extreme version of a Vulcan.

Then Anastasia meets the dashing billionaire Christian Grey.  He’s described as being “tormented,” most likely due to the fact that he is having an out-of-body experience and can see what his life would be like outside of this book (i.e. better).  He’s probably also tormented because his first name is Christian and there’s no way he can live up to its meaning.  How hard his life must be, and yet somehow millions of women have fallen for this guy.  In fact, in England, experts are betting that there will be a baby boom this year because women got so worked up over Mr. Fictional Grey that they went home to their Mr. Real-Life Dudes and got it on.

Moving on.  So after some happenstance meetings and overall non-existent character development and dialogue, these two end up having sex.  And since Anastasia was so non-sexual from the start, she loses her virginity to Mr. Grey, who seems to think it’s perfectly acceptable to “f*** hard” and then turn around and say, “Sorry, but I gotta get some paperwork done now.”

This is why Anastasia always remains a girl; throughout the book she never thinks for herself, which means she’s not a woman.  I don’t care that she had sex; she’s still a little, annoying, daft girl who doesn’t seem to have a care or idea that the man she says “Oh, my!” about a lot is really just treating her like a piece of meat.  She can’t think for herself; she just constantly wants to be around, near, on, under Christian.  She has no idea what Christian’s “playroom” is, and obviously would not understand the literal definition of the word innuendo if she saw it.  We’re supposed to believe this girl is a literature student?  She must be studying children’s books.  This is what her lack of a brain is telling women:

Christian is a whole other issue.  So long, feminism.  Adieu, years and years of trying to build respect between the sexes.  Christian Grey is here to screw with your goals by screwing Anastasia.  A man like him would be called a scoundrel, an asshole, and a dick in real life, but on the printed page he’s a godsend to all of womankind because he has, well, a dick.  Mr. Tormented seems like one of those guys who you may want to climb under the sheets with, but if you’re a sane human being you laugh at yourself hysterically and say, “He just wants to get into my pants!”

But, you know, apparently all the kinky sex Anastasia and Christian have is “hot” or something.  It made the New York Times bestseller list, which somehow makes the writing and its content legitimate.  What this implies then, ladies and gentlemen, is that people should start having BDSM parties in the streets to make the New York Times headlines to justify their sexual cravings.  Oh, wait.  That gets you arrested.

Overall, the book is about sex, and not much else.  It’s titillating, raw, and passionate.  Anastasia and Christian have lots of it while their characters and the story plummet into literary demise.  You can see Ellen DeGeneres read an excerpt here to get a good summary of the majority of the book.  Or, if you’re like me and prefer something more realistic, you can view this incredible 50 shades of grey poster (my kitchen remodeling suddenly looks so much more attractive now).

CCI 2012: Westboro Baptists = Nothing Accomplished

Christians never cease to baffle me.

When I read about the Westboro Baptist Church’s protest of Comic-Con International, I had to make sure that I did not turn around and punch a hole in the wall.  Then I had to laugh maniacally at their antics.  Then I just had to shake my head.

Everything I have read about this church just makes me cringe; it appears they never do anything truly Jesus-like and right according to the Bible they supposedly follow.  This protest was no exception.  Now, the Bible doesn’t say “don’t protest,” but it does tell us to love one another as Christ loved us, and I don’t believe Westboro’s signs or actions at Comic-Con imply this one little bit.  Sure, their intentions may have been mostly correct, that they don’t want people to be idol-worshipers (no, Thor is not really God, and if you want a better understanding of how the Norse gods actually reflect biblical truths just read up on all of J.R.R. Tolkien’s writings regarding that).  I also don’t think it’s good nor sane to make idols of the subjects at Comic-Con, either.  However, I am guessing only 20-25% of the people who attend Comic-Con (if that) are actually putting our beloved superheroes, game developers, and all-around cool people up on a pedestal they can grovel under.  The rest of the attendees are just there to have a wonderful time, a break from the real world where they can delve into worlds of truth, honor, and justice (and isn’t that what the Bible says God is, anyway?  That’s probably an entirely new article, though…).

Are those 20-25% people really worth the time to protest?  No, because protests rarely work, if ever, and the majority of the time they are never fully thought-out correctly by whoever happens to be organizing them (even non-Christians).  In fact, protests only ever seem to accomplish one or all of these things:

1.  Turn away the people you are supposedly trying to help.
2.  Imply that you’re ignorant about the topic or haven’t truly thought about it long enough.
3.  Reveal that you’re insane.
4.  Confirm that you’re both #2 and #3.
5.  Show that you could be doing something better with your time to actually change the situation.

#1 and #5 I think are the most disconcerting out of that list, however.  As Christians the entire point of believing in God is to bring people to his love by showing them his love.  Protesting simply cannot ever accomplish this.  A while back, I read a very articulate article about the issue of protesting in the Christian world, specifically as it related to the Starbucks public support of gay marriage this past year.  I wholeheartedly agreed with the author’s point that protests are in essence self-defeating, as they claim to argue against power in numbers yet by their very nature are indeed a “power in numbers” group.  The author’s concluding thought was, “Let’s not boycott our neighbors. Let’s not picket or scream or bellow. Let’s offer a cup of cold water, or maybe even a grande skinny vanilla latte, in Jesus’ name” (Moore).

What this implies about Comic-Con specifically is that Christians need to start participating, working, or creating in that geek culture.  This relates back to #2 in my list.  I am going to venture a solid guess that most Christian protests are based off of fear of the unknown.  How many protesting Christians actually read Harry Potter?  How many of them have ever picked up a comic book?  And how many of them have ever studied the biblical truths that simply resonate out of many science fiction creations?

Have you ever run across a Christian geek and been utterly amazed at their very existence?  That’s because we are in the minority, and many times we don’t want to admit that we are believers, not because we are ashamed of our beliefs but because we are immediately associated with people like the Westboro Baptist Church protesters.  We are not all the same (though we really should be if we all truly followed what God teaches).  Some of us simply adore Batman instead of protesting him, and would have less to talk about with others if we didn’t know about him.  Some of us think discussing the finer points of the latest video game instead of protesting it helps make others feel more loved and accepted in this world, not shunned.

So Westboro may continue to protest for years to come, and there will undoubtedly be counter-protests, pointing fingers, and all-around disgust towards them.  Remember, though, that they were never able to actually shut down CCI, and probably never will.  Just as they are wasting their time, you yourself could use your time wisely by hanging out with the geeky Christians who love stepping inside the San Diego convention center, possibly even dressed head-to-toe in Wonder Woman or Thor getup.  You’ll hopefully find that not all of us are ignorant, and you may even enjoy the experience, too.

Check out more Comic-Con coverage here, more pics on Tumblr and follow us over on Twitter! Oh, and Like our Facebook page while you at it!

CCI 2012: Halo 4 – Forward Unto Dawn Live-Action Trailer Plus Multiplayer Reactions!

As if Comic-Con wasn’t exciting enough, Microsoft and 343 Industries released the official trailer yesterday for their upcoming digital web series, Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn. It. Is. Epic.

Based on the beloved Halo universe, the series will premiere on October 5, 2012, on machinima.com’s new premiere channel, Machinima Prime, and on Halo Waypoint on Xbox Live. Five episodes are planned for promotional purposes leading up to the release of Halo 4 on November 6. The official Xbox Halo Waypoint site says, “Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn brings a brand new Halo story to life on a scale never before seen in the Halo Universe.” (Xbox.com: Halo Waypoint)

The story goes something like this:

Set against the backdrop of a United Nations Space Command (UNSC) military academy, a group of highborn cadets are training to be the next generation of soldiers in the UNSC’s ongoing war with insurrectionists in the outer colonial planets. Among these cadets, Thomas Lasky struggles with his doubts about this war, and with the burden of expectations he may not be able to carry. As Lasky comes to terms with his potential as a military leader, the terrifying alien alliance known as the Covenant arrives and turns his world upside down. Inspired by the Master Chief, he must decide what it means to be a hero. Halo fans who experience Lasky’s thrilling origin story in Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn will be rewarded with special insights into the story of Halo 4 and the “Halo Infinity Multiplayer” experience. (finance.yahoo.com)

Written by Todd and Aaron Helbing of Smallville and Spartacus, Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn also boasts director Stewart Hendler of Sorority Row. The up-and-coming cast is riddled with smaller names that have made appearances in big-title films. For example, Master Chief will be played by Daniel Cudmore, who has been in X2, X-Men: The Last Stand, and The Twilight Saga. Tom Green (Dance Academy) will play Thomas Lasky, the character whose story drives the web series. More stars and their respective characters include Anna Popplewell (The Chronicles of Narnia) as Chyler Silva, Ayelet Zurer (Angels & Demons, Munich) as Mehaffey, Mike Dopud (Mission Impossible – Ghost Protocol) as General Black, Enisha Brewster (Footloose) as April Orenski, Masam Holden (Grey’s Anatomy, Elizabethtown) as Michael “Sully” Sullivan, Osric Chau (2012) as JJ Chen, Iain Belcher (Supernatural) as Vickers, and Kat De Lieva as Dimah. (finance.yahoo.com)

Do I think this web series will be incredible? I think that was just a rhetorical question. Of course it will be. When video games started coming out with live-action trailers before the official release dates, all I could think of was, “That’s genius! What a way to get people more interested in the story than the gameplay. Video games are becoming real and relatable now.” Then when I saw the “Remember Reach” trailer which came out for Halo: Reach‘s promotion, I thought, “HO-LY SHIT. What did I just see?! My mind cannot contain or comprehend the glories that just scrolled in front of my eyes.”

If I was that stoked about the Reach trailer, you can very well expect this Halo fan of over 10 years to be more than ecstatic for another live-action viewing opportunity. For those of you wondering about the actual Halo 4 gameplay that is currently available at Comic-Con, all I can report is that our very own C Tan claims that the “multiplayer is awesome.” Take our word for it. (EDITOR’S NOTE: It was pretty sweet. Reminds me more of Halo 2 multi versus Halo 3, which is good. What was bad was I sucked at playing Halo so I got my ass kicked. Regardless, enjoyable and just feels a bit more balanced but that might have to deal with the fact no one else played it and didn’t have a great feel off the bat.)

For some additional eye candy on this series, you should check out this video by IGN: IGN First Look: Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn Behind-the-Scenes. They were able to attend the set in Vancouver, B.C., and get some incredible behind-the-scenes footage. You can then add this to your list of total Halo achievements completed.

Check out more Comic-Con coverage here, more pics on our Tumblr and follow the action at the Con over on our Twitter!

Female Gamers are People, Too.

I don’t know if you know this, but female gamers are kind of a big deal.

To be more precise, female gamers are a big deal because they have recently been the center of attention for many large news stories in the video game and popular culture industries. Why? Because they are being sexually bullied and harassed by people who apparently find fulfillment in such mean-spirited actions. Do you remember when you got pushed off the swing in elementary school, and then called names in high school, and then betrayed by your boy/girlfriend in college? The harassment against female gamers is like all of these situations rolled into one, except female gamers tend to never see their bullies face-to-face.

Gamer Jenny Haniver records and transcribes all sexually or otherwise demeaning discussions/messages that are hurled her way on Xbox Live. She blogs about them on her site, Not in the Kitchen Anymore, to try to shed light on the continually growing issue of online harassment against females. One glance through just the first page and you feel like you have to go wash your eyes and brain out with lye. Jenny’s experiences caught the attention of the BBC, and they featured her (along with Grace of Fat, Ugly, or Slutty) in a recent article titled “Sexual harassment in the world of video gaming.”

That same BBC article outlined another instance of very blatant sexual harassment that occurred in February at Capcom’s first fighting game reality show, Cross Assault. On day one of the tournament, Aris Bakhtanians, coach of the professional Tekken team, defended the inclusion and use of sexual harassment because it was simply “part of the community” of fight games; on day five, he implemented some of this sexual harassment towards female gamer Miranda Pakozdi, who became so upset by his insults that she forfeited the match entirely. Gamers around the world, outraged, took to the Internet to show their support for Pakozdi and to inquire after Capcom for not intervening in the situation already on day one when Bakhtanians said that “rape that bitch” was an acceptable insult because “(W)e’re in America… we can say what we want.”

Courtesy of gaurdian.co.uk

In a final example of harassment against female gamers, Anita Sarkeesian received a massive backlash of hatred and vandalism when she started a Kickstarter campaign to create a video series called “Tropes vs. Women in Video Games.” Some people even went so far as to hack and put up an explicit picture on Sarkeesian’s Wikipedia page and change her biography to call her a cunt. Sarkeesian was interviewed by none other than Wired magazine about the situation. On her blog, she said, “I am certainly not the first woman to suffer this kind of harassment and sadly, I won’t be the last. But I’d just like to reiterate that this is not a trivial issue. It can not and should not be brushed off by saying, ‘oh well that’s YouTube for you,’ ‘trolls will be trolls,’ or ‘it’s to be expected on the internet.’ These are serious threats of violence, harassment and slander across many online platforms meant to intimidate and silence. And it’s not okay.” (Feminist Frequency)

Of course, female gamers themselves are nothing new; they have been around for quite a while, and they’re a strong community in the video game industry. There’s even a group of professional female gamers known as the Frag Dolls who have been around since 2004, thanks to Ubisoft; they aim not only to kick some serious butt in video games but also to promote the interests of female gamers everywhere.


However, it’s only been within the last few years that the majority of female gamers have voiced their complaints and concerns about the large presence of sexism and misogyny within the larger gaming community. Gaming news sites have fortunately paid close attention to these situations and so the female gamers’ cause has come out in the open. In fact, a video series called Extra Credits has started a campaign against Xbox Live’s online platform, and Microsoft has actually responded to the campaign, saying that they are going to work to improve the sexual harassment situation. Time will tell if the gaming giant will follow through on its word.

In the meantime, every one of us gamers can do our own part to stop harassment and bullying against female players. If you’re one of those who bashes on the women whom you run across on Xbox Live, or if you’re one of those women who dishes it right back, the only way to make the gaming community a safe, enjoyable group for all of us is to avoid participating in and voicing such overzealous, hateful tirades even if we feel like it. Hopefully, in time, the encouraging, just-out-to-have-fun voices will start to overcome the hateful ones and fill the audiowaves of headsets around the world.

For more articles related to this story, check out these links:
http://www.smh.com.au/digital-life/games/its-a-mans-virtual-world-20120627-211du.html
http://www.destructoid.com/sexual-harassment-and-fightin-drama-together-at-last–222877.phtml
http://www.penny-arcade.com/report/editorial-article/sexual-harassment-as-ethical-imperative-the-ugly-side-of-fighting-games
http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/gamesblog/2012/mar/06/are-gamers-really-sexist
http://www.forbes.com/sites/johngaudiosi/2012/04/28/team-evil-geniuses-manager-anna-prosser-believes-more-female-gamers-will-turn-pro/
http://www.g4tv.com/thefeed/blog/post/722118/just-one-of-the-boys-female-gamers-in-multiplayer-games/

Maleficent Is on Her Way

Those of us who grew up with the classic Disney films have had the joy (or maybe sorrow?) of seeing these stories turned into live-action flicks over the past several years.  Quite possibly the best part of these remakes was the portrayal of the villains.  Glenn Close as Cruella De Vil in the 1996 version of 101 Dalmatians, for example, made me decide I’d much rather work for the cynical, harsh editor Miranda Priestly in The Devil Wears Prada.  Also, Charlize Theron’s recent evil queen in Snow White & the Huntsman sparked in me a new appreciation for a villain I had otherwise thought rather shallow. Now it’s time to make way for some visible horns.

Angelina Jolie as Maleficent Those eyes could stare into your soul.

Set to release in 3D on March 14, 2014, Maleficent promises to share the other side to the 1959 animated classic Sleeping Beauty, this time focusing on development of Maleficent’s character.  The official Disney statement said, “The film reveals the events that hardened her heart and drove her to curse the baby, Aurora” (LATimes).  Directed by Robert Stromberg (production designer for Avatar and Alice in Wonderland) the cast is being led by Angelina Jolie, who has “already got her horns fitted” and has taken on the gutsy task of performing some of her own stunts.  Jolie points out in an interview with Entertainment Weekly that Maleficent is a multi-layered character who has her strengths and weaknesses just like any other person:

I hope in the end you see a woman who is capable of being many things, and just because she protects herself and is aggressive, it doesn’t mean she can’t have other [warmer] qualities. You have to figure out the puzzle of what she is…  It sounds really crazy to say that there will be something that’s good for young girls in this, because it sounds like you’re saying they should be a villain. [Maleficent] is actually a great person. But she’s not perfect. She’s far from perfect.  (EW)

The film also stars Elle Fanning as Maleficent’s opposite, Princess Aurora, as well as Juno Temple, Harlto Copley, and Imelda Staunton.  Production has already started in England, and apparently the Jolie-Pitt kids are making some trips to see their mother perform in all her robed glory.

Since Maleficent was always one of my favorite villains because she was just so purely dark and wicked, I am both curious and hesitant to see this production in its final release.  I’m always interested in hearing the other side of the story; that’s just a reasonable, fair way to learn and interact with other people in life.  However, I don’t believe that younger children should see this film, as their young minds are used to more black and white standards, and will not be able to fully grasp the situation of Maleficent’s proposed internal struggles and development.  The nature of such a character is probably better saved for more mature audiences, such as teens on  up, who can discuss and analyze that character and all her decisions and the impact they make.

Overall, for a character whom I believe most people thus far have considered 100% evil (I mean, really, who doesn’t?  She invokes the powers of hell, which seems pretty darn evil), Maleficent definitely promises to shed some new light on this horned female; we’ll just have to wait to see if that light will give us some nourishing vitamin D or if it will leave our skin burned and peeling.

‘Guild Wars 2’ Release Date Announced!

Fans of Guild Wars can rejoice.

Today Mike O’Brien of ArenaNet announced the official release date of the Guild Wars sequel, Guild Wars 2, after a few rounds of beta and stress tests.  So starting on August 28, 2012, all you guildies can hit that power button and join in on the glory (no, the word guildies does not have to stay in the WoW gaming community only).

O’Brien said that today was an “incredibly momentous day” and that “we’re on the cusp of a new era in online roleplaying games, and we’re glad you’re on this journey with us.”

Unofficial Guild Wars 2 concept artUnofficial Guild Wars 2 concept art by Kekai Kotaki

For those who want to try to get on the game last-minute for its official release, the final beta testing will be held from July 20-22.  Other things you can do before the release date to satiate your cravings for all things Guild Wars 2:

1. Pre-order.  You get an in-game item, beta access (presumably for this last testing now), and a 3-day head start so you can mock all your friends who didn’t pre-order.

2. Watch this new trailer:

3. If you haven’t already, read the development team’s manifesto released in 2010.

4. Follow @GuildWars2 on Twitter and use any of these three hashtags to share the MMO love: #GW2, #GW2iscoming, and #GuildWars2.

5. There are some cool things to check out on the official website, www.guildwars2.com.  You can view fancy concept art, download a snazzy wallpaper, and buy an adorable Charr plush!  Yes, I’m done with the adjectives now.

6. Finally, there are probably thousands of forums you can join to discuss the game with fellow fans, like www.guildwarsguru.com.  Just choose your favorite one and start freaking out via the keyboard.

7. Finally-finally (for real), you can leave a comment below and let us know what you think about Guild Wars 2.  Are you excited?  Nervous?  So giddy with delight…