All posts by Amanda Broyles

Amanda is amazing. Amanda is spectacular. Amanda is humble. Amanda is also a full time college student so take pity on her and don't complain when her TV reviews aren't up immediately following an episode.

Boardwalk Empire: 3.07 – “Sunday Best”

October 29, 2012 Amanda Broyles Leave a comment

Remember how much I disliked last week’s episode? How only the presence of Richard Harrow saved it from ranking as my least favorite episode of the season? That there was way too much bat shit crazy Gillian and how much I hate her?

I take it all back. Even though last week was as interesting as a watching grass grow, it led into this week’s episode that was absolutely amazing. Even if nothing of note had happened, the set up of the episode with everyone and their respective Easter dinners was fabulously done.

First off, I’d like to formally apologize to Gillian. Please do not misread this- I still think you are crazy as a shithouse rat, but I’ll concede that apparently you had a plan when you went out and found the Jimmy look-alike. Was it a plan I would have come up with? Of course not, because I am a normal and sane human being, but hey I guess you got to work with what you’ve got. So now you’ve got a body to pass off as Jimmy’s and you can go ahead and claim all his/the Commodore’s money and be on your merry way. I can only hope that you won’t take Tommy down with you but as the saying goes, if wishes were horses, then beggars would ride.

Apparently when one brother tries to kill the other and then that brother sends the first brother to jail for a year and a half, things like family holiday dinners don’t happen. Color me shocked. So that’s how we end up with Eli’s family meeting Margaret and her children for the first time. Nothing says awkward like espousing the virtues of spring and new life and new beginnings and later learning that your brother in law’s marriage is in the shitter. I literally laughed out loud when after Margaret pours her heart out to June,[pullquote_right]”I feel like the life is being pressed out of me.” -Margaret Thompson[/pullquote_right] the response was “oh you brought a pineapple upside down.” I mean seriously, what do you say to a woman you’ve never met before when she goes on to tell you how awful her marriage is to the brother of your husband who controls for all intents and purposes, your livelihood?

The writers are back on the “make people care about Eli” train because sweet lord how adorable was he this entire episode? A little whiny when he was talking to Nucky about his job but when he was hiding the eggs and then the scenes with his wife? Incredibly sweet. Makes me want to like him. Again. Damn them. Not to mention all those kids! It was a banner day for sweetness from all the Thompson children. Except Teddy- he’s still a creep who thinks girls can’t be politicians. Yea well neither can pyromaniac sociopaths, so there! I did like how they kept going back to “Brian… Patrick”, one can only imagine with nine nieces and nephews they can start to all run together.

Seriously though? Why can’t Nucky and Margaret get their shit together? Don’t they realize that they still love each other? I mean hello- look at Nucky’s face. That is a man who still loves his wife. Sadly it seems as if that ship has finally sailed. If your wife doesn’t want to learn how to juggle from you, then might as well contact the lawyers.

Even though we’ve seen Gyp Rosetti a lot this season (and I do mean a lot) we hadn’t really learned a lot beyond he has a short temper and is a freak in the bedroom. Oh and he doesn’t think the phrase “it isn’t personal” should be used. This week we got a bit more of an idea of what his life is like. I don’t know where he got his driver/bodyguard/lackey, but he needs to keep him around because it seems like he is the only person that is able to say anything to him without causing Mt. Rosetti to erupt. Either that or Gyp doesn’t actually listen to a word he says as he meticulously de-lints his suit. I love love love his family. What’s not to love? Loud, boisterous, and opinionated women around a table? It’s like holiday dinners at my parent’s house (there are three sisters and one brother- and we are all very loud people).

As fun as the dinner scene was, the church scene was amazing. Only Gyp Rosetti would get in a fight in an empty church with a painting of Jesus. Seriously. And over what? Because he feels like he’s been slighted in life? Dude, you are a gangster who likes setting people on fire, or beating them to death for innocuous comments. It’s not like you are some upstanding citizen who tends to the poor and feeds the hungry out of his own kitchen during his off time from working with blind orphans. I mean come on. And then you beat down a priest and stole the collection money. Perhaps taking a step back and looking at yourself before your next throw down with the big guy upstairs, huh?

That scene did totally remind me of this one though, one of the best shows ever.

At least President Bartlett was angry over something happening to someone he loves, not necessarily only himself. Gyp might want to take a page from that book.

The scene with Masseria was perhaps the most telling though. Given Gyp’s larger than life persona, you’d think he was this big mover and shaker in the bootlegging business. Apparently not. It seems that he matters so little that Masseria is ready to just cut him loose (I think we all know what that means) instead of putting up with his shit anymore. It wasn’t until Gyp started railing against Nucky and Rothstein and pretty much everyone else on the eastern seaboard that Masseria begins to consider him useful again. Is this finally putting more structure behind what will surely be the big face off between Gyp and Nucky sometime later in the season? I think so.

It probably comes as no surprise that my favorite parts of the episode were those involving Richard Harrow. I can’t remember the last time I wanted a character to find happiness more than I do him. He’s just such a tragic person that you can’t help but hope for the best for him. I damn near shrieked in delight when he showed up at Julia’s house for Easter dinner. Holiday dinner with the family? That’s a big deal right? So what if the neighbors were invited as well, Julia wasn’t setting a plate in private for them. On one hand it makes me sad that she did that but if that’s what Richard prefers, I guess it’s more sweet than sad. She recognizes that he is uncomfortable and instead of forcing it (like Angela sort of did when she told him that he shouldn’t be ashamed to eat in front of them) she just makes sure he has a plate.

My heart was in my throat when Tommy opened that door to Julia’s brother’s room. I could just picture her dad going apeshit, and lo and behold… he did. Granted, Tommy should not have been in the room in the first place, but who yells like that at a little kid? Man knows how to clear a house, that’s for sure.

It’s been hours since I watched the show and I still can’t get over how adorable Julia and Richard’s first “date” was. Equally as awkward but come on, they are so cute together! Once they got past the whole “don’t threaten to kill my father again” part, things seemed to go a bit more smoothly. Then of course, they got roped in by one of those obnoxious “let me take your picture and then sell it to you for an obscene amount of money” booths. It is so nice to see those haven’t changed much since the 1920’s. With so many American innovations gone by the wayside, it’s comforting to know that some things still remain the same.

In any case, Richard has another happy family picture to add to his book. Every time that damn book makes an appearance I want to cry. Now that he’s put that picture in there, I’m certain they are going to kill off either Richard or Julia. It just isn’t Boardwalk Empire if the viewers hearts aren’t being ripped out and stomped on in a regular fashion.

As much as I loved every part of Richard Harrow’s storyline this week, it was the final scene between (shocker!!!!) Gillian and Richard that was the best in my opinion. Gillian finally admits that Jimmy is dead and when she was crying she seemed almost human. It was heartbreaking. Of course she doesn’t give Richard a heads up about the dead body in the bathtub but hey, this is Gillian we are talking about. That last shot of her sitting by herself just looking defeated was gut wrenching though.

This episode, for me, was damn near perfection. Even though it had almost none of the side stories (we did see Masseria but that was in direct correlation to Nucky) and I usually enjoy those, this was the type of episode I wish they’d make more often. In my dream world, the New York and Chicago groups would have their own show that would occasionally meld into Boardwalk Empire when the need arose, and vice versa. Then there could be these episodes that focused on these main characters more often instead of a snippet here and there that feels distracting from the main story. Case in point- does anyone remember what Chalky White is doing now? Hell does anyone remember what Chalky White even looks like? It seems like it’s been forever since we saw him for more than 30 seconds here and there. He’s like an SNL cast member who is in every sketch one week and then you don’t see them again except in the credits and goodbyes for over a month. I think it’s time Chalky got his own show. Starting a petition to HBO now…

In the meantime, I’m going to have to go big or go home and give this episode a 4.5 bears. It was as close to perfection as I’ve seen in a while.

Until next time!

Arrow: 1.03 – ‘Lone Gunman’

October 25, 2012 Amanda Broyles Leave a comment

While the first two episodes of Arrow had villains, they were mainly focused on introducing us to the main cast of characters and a little bit of everyone’s back-stories. With “Lone Gunman” however, there was more of a balance between the two, and it was a nice balance. The episode started off with the somewhat irritating voiceover. This portion of voiceover was telling us about James Holder and his lack of quality control when it came to his smoke detectors.

Cut to a beautiful overlook of nighttime Starling City thanks to James Holder’s rooftop pool. I’d be okay with having a pool like that. Lucky James Holder. Sorry, no, Bad James Holder! If Arrow is on your rooftop after dark, chances are pretty good that you are not a good person, no matter what the courts say. So, Arrow is up there doing his “you have failed this city” bit when lo and behold, someone new appears. Well, they don’t really appear but their handiwork does.

Who is it?

If you are at all familiar with Batman, then you know this man. It is none other than Deadshot! He lived up to his name because that pool I really loved? Well, it’s got a dead dude floating in it now. Suddenly, not as appealing.

In the exchange though, Oliver got nicked by one of Deadshot’s bullets. Oh bummer. Oliver has to stitch himself up.

I do have to wonder though, Oliver has the supplies in his lair to stitch up a bullet wound but he doesn’t have a damn band-aid anywhere? Just seeing him sitting at his desk with blood soaking through his shirt made me think of what a pain in the ass that would be to get clean. Come on Ollie, get it together. Then again, maybe it was the poison that made him forget about the band-aid. Poison? Oh yeah, Deadshot uses poison on his bullets. Which leads into a nice flashback and we got to see more of the mysterious hooded man on the island.

This answers the question of how Oliver learned to speak Mandarin; it’s none other than Yao Fei. It’s yet to be seen if they’ll go into Yao Fei’s long and somewhat detailed backstory, but obviously the physician and archer parts are playing a key role. We also see where Oliver learned about the “chew something that looks like rosemary to stop the poison” thing.

Ollie heads home after waking up from his drug induced nap, and well I’ll be, Thea’s been arrested. Is it too early to dislike a character? Because I can not stand Thea. I just want her to either pull her head out of her obnoxious ass and become a contributing member of society or them to make her into Speedy. I don’t really want her to become Speedy but I just want Thea to disappear. Gone, gone, gone, gone, gone. While we’re on the subject, what is the deal with Mommy Queen being so “I’m a good person and parent” in this episode? I mean, I know Oliver gave her crap for the Thea thing but not one hint to her darkside that we know exists. No mention of what Oliver knows or what his dad told him. I want the Evil Queen to return. Thea leaves, Evil Queen comes back. I’ll be pleased as punch if those two things were to occur.

It was only a matter of time before Oliver had to find a way to get to his base without always having to ditch Diggle. Apparently he’s decided to open a nightclub. How stereotypical privileged party boy of a move is that? Come on. I loved Diggle calling him out on the “white knight” thing Oliver has going on.

Perhaps the second best part of the episode is when Oliver decided that he needed to go find a bullet that Deadshot used. To do so he had to go all Assassin’s Creed and climb the side of a building. But unlike in Assassin’s Creed when you can hear people question what on earth (insert name of preferred ancestor of Desmond Miles here) is doing, not a single soul comments on Oliver’s wall climbing stunt. Perhaps this is the best place to open a nightclub/have a secret lair.

The bullet led Oliver to the Russian mob that he apparently became a ranking member of during his time as a shipwrecked castaway. Come again? I daresay that took me by surprise.

I do wonder what kind of timeline this episode had because one minute Oliver is showing Tommy and Diggle the location of his new nightclub, and the next Laurel is reading about said nightclub online. She’s telling her coworker that she’s totally over Oliver but I think we all know the truth. But who cares about the truth because hello! This happened!

You go girl! Now all she needs is some fishnet stockings and a tight fitting bustier and the Black Canary will take her rightful place in the show. So exciting as I’d actually feared they’d keep Laurel as that helpless chick she was in episode two. Thankfully my worry was all for naught.

So while Oliver was climbing buildings and planning night clubs openings and then getting his ass kicked by bouncers at another club, Deadshot was tattooing names onto his body. There was quite a few names already there but one stood out in particular- Andrew Diggle- especially considering that we learn that Diggle had a brother who was killed doing the same type of work. Did Deadshot kill Diggle’s brother? Is the tattooed name just a shoutout to Andy Diggle, who wrote Green Arrow: Year One? I’m guessing we’ll find out soon.

Speaking of Diggle, his sister in law works at none other than DC Universe’s own, Big Belly Burger! This was the second time I had a DC Universe “moment”, the first being when the annoying voiceover let us know that Deadshot had killed people in Markovia. It’s those kinds of little things that get fans really excited about your show so kudos to Arrow.

Non-kudos to whoever was doing DirecTV’s captioning because they seem to think this woman:

is named Felicity Smoke. Come on people, get with the program- that is Felicity SMOAK and isn’t she just the cutest little IT girl ever? That scene did provide some fun back and forth as Oliver tried to claim the laptop he brought her needed help due to a spilled latte. Nothing gets past that Felicity though and she deftly points out that those are bullet holes, not spilled coffee. Oliver’s only recourse is to admit that “my coffee shop is in a bad neighborhood”. Chuckle, chuckle.

That coffeehouse was actually the hotel room of Deadshot and the latte was his wrist mounted machine guns but hey, let’s not get bogged down in facts here. The rest of the episode was the predictable auction, with the predictable saving from Deadshot’s bullet by Detective Lance, and Oliver’s predictable stashing of his Arrow get-up in the stairway trashcan and then the fight with Deadshot.

Two things that were not predictable-

One: HE KILLED DEADSHOT?!?!?!

Surely not, right? I mean come on. If they are going to kill a DC villain each episode, the show isn’t going to last too terribly long. I know there are a lot of them but there aren’t an infinite number. So I’m choosing to believe that Deadshot is not dead but perhaps just unconscious and yea, that eye is not going to make it, so I’m guessing he’ll be a one eyed Deadshot. [Ed. Note – Not for 1 second do I believe Deadshot is dead. The character has a long history of faking his own death…]

Two: OH MY GOD HE TOLD DIGGLE!!!!
Diggle gets shot, Arrow rushes him back to his base so he can give him the grass stuff that looks like rosemary. Diggle wakes up to see Oliver standing there still in his Arrow clothes but the “mask” is now gone and he just says “hey” and the episode ends!

So much for “no one can know”, but seriously, how long was he going to be able to keep it from him? The man has already told him that he’s going to have to watch him pee so it was only a matter of time before he found out any way. I was just not expecting them to do it so early.

Overall, not a bad episode. I’m still a little miffed about Deadshot possibly being dead and I could not care less about the whole “Laurel used to date/sleep with Tommy” bit and as far as I’m concerned, Thea can take a long walk off a short pier but for the most part I liked it. I’m going to go with three and a half bears on this one. Get rid of Thea, make Laurel the Black Canary and we’d be at a solid four.

Next Episode – “An Innocent Man”. I can’t wait!

Arrow: John Barrowman and the Huntress?

October 24, 2012 Amanda Broyles Leave a comment

Click here for a brief/not so brief recap of the first two episodes of the CW’s new show, Arrow.

So, what’s in Arrow’s future? Well first off, thankfully there is a longer future as the CW, wisely, just gave Arrow a full season order. As is common, they’d initially gotten a 13 episode order, but now it’s for a full 22. The pilot had 4.14 million watching making it the most watched since The Vampire Diaries. Not only that but the second episode brought in 3.5 million- not too shabby. If numbers continue even close to these, I don’t think anyone will be surprised if they announce they are renewing it for a second season here in a couple of months.

Continue reading Arrow: John Barrowman and the Huntress? →

CW’s ‘Arrow’ – 2 Episode Review: “Pilot & Honor Thy Father”

October 24, 2012 Amanda Broyles 1 Comment

Ever since Smallville went off the air, I haven’t turned on the CW at all. I’ve watched Supernatural, but that’s all been off of Netflix and up until this summer I was pretty certain I wouldn’t watch CW again. For the most part I’m just not a fan of their shows. Well, with the new show Arrow, that has all changed.

It was actually because of Smallville that I tuned into Arrow in the first place. Way back in season 8 they introduced Justin Hartley as the Green Arrow with this (you’ll have to click on it because there was no embedding, sorry). Now, I’m a DC girl and have been a Green Arrow fan for quite some time and I remember thinking when I saw that episode, “hmmmm, I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone play the Green Arrow before.” For good reason, you see, Justin Hartley was actually the first ever live action Green Arrow and Stephen Amell is now the second. Not a bad little brotherhood to be in.

Actually brotherhood might be stretching it a little, they are more like cousins. Very close cousins, sure, but cousins all the same.

The pilot (I’m going to say pilot here but it’s more likely that because I’m going to quickly discuss both episodes, they are just going to go back and forth) starts off with a hooded man, who could either be homeless or a castaway. We learn quickly that he is of the castaway variety and he’s been lost on this island for five years. That lines up all right with Green Arrow canon but then Oliver Queen heads home to Star City, I’m sorry, to Starling City and meets up with his mom (what?), Moira Queen (played by the incredible Susanna Thompson, (Queen Rose it is so nice to have you back on my TV) and his sister (double what??), Thea (Willa Holland). Oh, and his best friend is Tommy Merlyn (Colin Donnell). Yes, I said his best friend. Surely they will have Tommy become Merlyn before too long, right?

As if all that wasn’t enough, Oliver has an ex-fiance named Laurel (CW go-to-girl Katie Cassidy) who Oliver was cheating on with her sister (Dinah, I mean Laurel, has a sister?) who accompanied Oliver and his father Robert (Jamey Sheridan) on the yacht trip that ended up being the last trip she and Robert ever took and the one that landed Oliver on the island.

Oh and biggest “did you just see that?” moment for me was right here:

Was Deathstroke on the island? What happened to him? Surely Arrow didn’t kill him? Right? Especially since pictures have been released of him from a future episode, but were they flashbacks? So many questions that I would like answers to!

So yes, there is a lot involved right off the bat that doesn’t stick to the traditional Green Arrow story but luckily Arrow still works. After we’ve met everyone, including Oliver’s new bodyguard John Diggle (David Ramsey) and the lawman, Detective Quentin Lance (Paul Blackthorne, a man I would watch do anything) the pilot goes into setting up Oliver as Arrow. While catching up with his old friend Tommy, they are both attacked and drugged by masked men. They then interrogate Oliver over what his father told him. Thing is, Daddy dearest sort of offed himself in the life raft before he could tell his boy anything beyond “I failed our city and I was not the only one.”

And there, friends and neighbors, is Arrow’s motivation. He is going to return to Starling City with a book his father had in his pants (that Oliver fished out after his father had been dead for an amount of time that seems to be between rigor mortis ending and decomp fully setting in, which is nasty) and now has a list of those people who Oliver’s father feels was part of the ruining of his hometown.

He sets himself up a pretty nice “Arrow Cave” in an abandoned factory his father used to own. I’m not going to lie, there are some definite upsides to this show and they don’t have a lot to do with the plot.

Laurel is a lawyer who works at the nicest legal aid office in the entire universe. With the prettiest people. In the pilot she is suing Adam Hunt, coincidentally, a man listed on Oliver’s list. Arrow goes into what I like to call “Christopher Nolan’s image of Batman” mode and voila, all of Laurel’s clients have a shit ton of money thanks to one of Arrow’s “trick” arrows, this one apparently can do something with computers. In the second episode we got to see China White, the first of what appears to be many planned DC villains scheduled (last I saw so far they have Deathstroke, Deadshot, The Huntress [more of a hero], and the Royal Flush Gang) to appear on the show.

We did find out why they chose to have Oliver’s mom be alive, as she apparently is either a baddie herself or is closely related to the mystery baddie. Oooohhhhh, intrigue!

The first two episodes were great, but left a lot of questions unanswered. Biggest one; where’s Roy Harper? In the pilot, Oliver calls his sister Speedy very quickly in passing. Surely they aren’t ditching Roy Harper and having Thea be Speedy, right? On one hand I’m sort of okay with it, I like watching sibling relationships but at the same time, I like Roy Harper and would like to see him on the show.

And how does John Diggle factor into all of this? He already suspects that Oliver isn’t the asshole party boy that he’s pretending to be. So how long until Oliver lets him in on the act? Speaking of, why is Laurel pretending to be this damsel in distress? Hello woman, you are supposed to be the Black Canary, so get your shit together and find some black spandex pronto.

Another question. How on earth did Oliver become this martial arts master who can shoot a bow and arrow with the best of them all whilst being stranded alone on a supposedly deserted island? Oh, and where did he learn to speak Russian and Mandarin? Was there a copy of the Rosetta Stone left there by a previous castaway?

That question might have been answered at the end of the second episode with the appearance of a man in a green hood, who has incredible aim with a bow and arrow. Is this who taught Oliver the skills he would later use to clean up Starling City? Time (and perhaps the next few episodes) will only tell.

One last one, then I’ll move on. Ummm… what exactly is this substance Oliver is smearing on his face in lieu of a mask? It obviously isn’t something that permanent as he was able to remove it rather quickly to get back to the party. Inquiring minds want to know.

If I was forced to pick one thing that annoyed me about the show so far, it would be it’s at times blatant rip off of Batman Begins. I get that they are trying to go for that darker feel to the show but swinging the bad guy from the rafters? Having Laurel be an almost carbon copy of Rachel Dawes? I really hope they put an end to that and find their own voice. Otherwise all you’ll hear about is people comparing it to the movie, which would be disappointing.

So there’s the first two episodes in a nutshell. Join me in tuning into the CW on Wednesday nights at 8 eastern and then we’ll meet up back here and discuss.

Let’s just say, we better be discussing this guy turning bad here pretty soon or I’m going to be miffed.

Movie Trailers

The First ‘Iron Man 3’ Trailer has Arrived!

October 23, 2012 Amanda Broyles Leave a comment

So first we had the teaser for the trailer, and now we have the teaser trailer…

Explosions! Iron Man suit without Tony Stark! The Mandarin played by the perennially sexy Ben Kingsley! Pepper Potts is kidnapped! And then strapped into the Mr. Freeze roller coaster at Six Flags over St. Louis! I don’t know if that’s right but it feels good so I’m going with it!

I’m part of the 1%… of people who actually like Gwyneth Paltrow and I like the movie character of Pepper Potts. So sue me, she’s cute and likable. Even though we did get a glimpse of Don Cheadle as James Rhodes (sidenote: if you aren’t watching House of Lies on Showtime, you are missing out), where was Jon Favreau’s Happy Hogan?

Seriously- Guy Pearce as Aldrich Killian. Just from what little we can see of the suit and the hair, it looks like he’s moments away from shooting at Crockett and Tubbs of Miami Vice fame.

Overall initial impression- I like it. I’m a big fan of when traditionally “happy” things turn a little dark. Tony Stark has always been the Whopper eating shit grinned billionaire playboy without many cares in the world (I mean there have been obvious cares to tend to but he’s done so usually with a somewhat good attitude) so it’s nice to see him be a little bit more introspective.

This obviously won’t be the only trailer released but even if it was, I’m excited. Marvel seems to have found their groove with this group of movies and for the time being, they aren’t feeling played out. Now ask me again when we reach Iron Man 7, but for now, I’m looking forward to Iron Man 3.

This doesn’t have a lot to do with Iron Man specifically but seeing his mountain side palace be blown to smithereens reminded me of it. I was listening to NPR the other day and a story came on about superheroes and their finances. It was entertaining, if nothing else. You can listen to it here and if you were so inclined you can order the book The Law of Superheroes from Amazon.

Boardwalk Empire: 3.06 – “Ging Gang Goolie”

October 23, 2012 Amanda Broyles Leave a comment

So last week was quite the action packed episode. More so the last fiveish minutes. We were reminded that there was a political struggle going on still with the Senate hearing thing. Margaret is about fresh out of patience with Nucky. The same Nucky who is bound and determined to be Billie Kent’s savior even though she neither needs, nor wants one. Rothstein is not a man to be messed with, at all. And Gyp’s a freak; a freak who apparently has nine lives.

This week? Ugh, where to begin.

Oh how about with thepoint in the show I nearly threw something at my TV? Seriously Gillian? What the hell is wrong with you? I mean, really? REALLY?

Run Roger McAllister of Evansville, Indiana… RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Read my lips woman: You. Need. Psychiatric. Help. There’s really no other words for this crap. Just blech. Dear writers, I implore you, find a way to kill her off. Please. I’ll be your best friend.

I’m sort of torn on the political/legal stuff. On one hand, it’s entertaining in a “you have to keep up with the story” kind of way. But on the other hand, I’ve watched this show from the beginning and am a rather intelligent being, but damn if I can’t keep everyone straight there. Who is paying who? Who is double crossing who? Answer: Means is double crossing Remus. Actually, Means is double crossing anyone if given the right amount of money. What a guy.

I stick with it because even though I can’t remember where they are, time wise, right now, I’m fairly certain President Harding is going to leave on his cross country trip and subsequently die here soon. Not going to lie, I’m really looking forward to seeing if the writers have Harding die of a heart attack or if they are going to go into the conspiracy theory side of things.

Best part of all is Nucky’s run in with the law (thank you Harry Daugherty) when he went to pay his $5 fee. Of course, he doesn’t have anything less than a hundred! Who do these people think he is? Some schlub making five cases of whiskey in his basement? Come on now, let’s not be foolish.

I take it back, while the $5 thing was amusing, best part of all that was that Esther Randolph has returned! A little sad given that she’s now stuck in night court after completely shitting the bed on the Nucky thing. But hey, what’s this? Nucky wants to join forces with Ms. Randolph, Esq.? Nothing bad could come of this. I’m pretty sure of it.

Teddy Thompson. I’m calling it now, this kid is going to grow up and become a serial killer. Just a feeling I have. He carries around kerosene and matches, he fakes having polio when he knows his mom is freaking out about it due to his sister lying in the hospital stricken with polio. He sleeps with a knife under his pillow. Teddy is one dead cat away from appearing on an episode of Criminal Minds.

If I had the time, I’d go back and watch every episode to see how many times Margaret answered the phone and got good news. Homegirl (I apologize) needs to stop answering the phone. This week’s phone call involved the four words no one ever wants to hear; “We need to talk”.

What were you wanting to talk about Margaret?

This?

Or maybe this?

Ah, screw all that. I’m sure you just wanted to talk about these guys who, trivia moment, were like the Beanie Babies of their time. I hope I live long enough to see a high school with a Beanie Baby mascot.

So Margaret knows about “we need to talk” but apparently she’s not familiar with “people with bad marriages to a bootlegging gangster probably shouldn’t go about schtupping the previously mentioned gangster’s right hand man in the greenhouse with it’s glass walls”. Just a thought.

For me, the entire episode might as well have consisted of horses dancing to Lady Gaga because it was nothing compared to the return of Richard Harrow!

Awww, young(er) Richard had a puppy. I just want to hug and him kiss and snuggle with his beautiful face. I’m talking about the dog.

Richard was the best part of the night for many reasons. One; he’s been missing for a disturbingly long time. Two; he’s just fabulous. Three- he might have gone and gotten himself a girl. How cute is he?

This could be the perfect start to a relationship. You don’t have to worry about meeting her dad because you already helped his drunken ass out of a bar after he got the crap beat out of him in a brawl. Poets write of things like this.

I’m hoping Julia Sagorski sticks around because she busted out one of my favorite idioms, “don’t take any wooden nickels“, which is basically a cool way of saying “hey, be careful”.

Given how slow and boring and bad this episode was, I’m hoping it’s just setting up for some more entertaining ones down the pike. There was no Chicago, no New York (not really, Lucky trying to peddle dope in Gillian’s whorehouse doesn’t count), and no Chalky White. If there hadn’t been the significant showing of Richard Harrow, this episode would have been ranked closer to two bears rather than the three and a half I’m going with.

I’ll leave you with this. There is no way on earth this was not intentional. No way at all.

On to next week!

Grizzly Bomb