Category Archives: MOVIES

Why We’re Hungry for ‘The Hunger Games’: New Trailer and Maps of Panem!

We’ve seen quite a few franchises rip through social media these days, and they all have the same things in common.  One, they come from popular books series. IE: Harry Potter and Twilight.  The Hunger Games is no different.  Two, they all have gigantic budgets with big studios backing them.  They can boast the latest in CGI, costume design, even scores by some of the top composers.  And three, they can take many liberties and let the foot off the gas creatively (and they often do) because they all have multitudes of preteen fans ready to spend their lunch money on a movie ticket, even before the film is released.  The result is generally poor writing and even worse acting.

Continue reading Why We’re Hungry for ‘The Hunger Games’: New Trailer and Maps of Panem!

Grizzly Review: Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie

It’s always an exciting and equally worrisome affair when your favorite TV show or internet sensation gets their own movie. On the bright side, that gem of a show that you love and cherish oh so much is finally getting the feature film treatment that they deserve. But, on the downside, if big budget investors step in and ruin what made the source material so great, well, then you as the viewer have to deal with the heartbreak. There’s also the rare occasion when the program still airs after the movie has come out and it just flat-out sucks. A victim of this horrible occurrence? The one and only Spongebob Squarepants Movie. Great movie, everything after 2005 on the show was just complete and total s***.

Adult Swim comic geniuses Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim, known for their extremely odd television program, “Tim and Eric, Awesome Show! Great Job!” have finally been honored with a feature film entitled, Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie. Known for their random sketch comedy and short but hilarious ideas, many fans of the show were worried that when stretched to feature-length, the dynamic duo would lose their edge and the entire movie would just be one big, bad joke.

The plot involves Tim and Eric wasting a billion dollars on a movie funded by Schlaaang, a fictitious production company led by the diabolical Tommy Schlaaang (Robert Loggia), who, after screening the movie and complaining, “I spent a billion dollars on this piece of s***?!”, demands that Tim and Eric get him his money back or he’ll kill them both. After getting Hollywood makeovers, they realize that they can no longer manage to afford the life of glitz and glamour that they love dearly. After being forced to fire their spiritual guide Jim Joe Kelly (Zach Galifianakis), they go to their favorite night club to deal with their remorse, making a plan to drink themselves into oblivion and do countless stupid things.

While in the bathroom, Eric sees an advertisement at his urinal that claims to have the answers to all the problems. The S’Wallow Valley Mall, located in the “historic S’Wallow Valley” needs a new owner. Damien Weebs (Will Ferrell), the current operator of the S’Wallow Valley Mall promises anyone who comes to “run my mall” a billion dollar paycheck. Desperately, Tim and Eric decide to make the trip out and see if they can get their billion dollars.

Arriving at the entrance, the two men suddenly realize how decrepit and possibly diseased this place is. Hobos are scattered all over the floor, the place looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in days, but low and behold, there are still a few shops up and running. After an awkward meeting with Weebs which includes two back-to-back viewings of Top Gun, Tim and Eric decide to take over the mall under the name Dobin PR.

Tim and Eric are Gods in the world of cult classics, with Hall of Fame photos right next to Tommy Wiseau and Jared and Jerusha Hess. They had an extremely successful show on Adult Swim until 2010, when the pair decided that they had stretched themselves to their comedic limits as far as the show was concerned. They then started working on Billion Dollar Movie, abbreviated as B$M, and the final product is this masterpiece of comedic cinema that I’m reviewing right now.

The only possible comparison that I can give this movie is Napoleon Dynamite meets A Serbian Film. The humor is equal parts bizarre and disgusting, and you know that the thing that most comedy films have, it’s called a heart? Yeah, well this movie doesn’t have that. When your movie involves a small child being blown to smithereens mid-air, you know you’ve got a hit on your hands. The performances are surprisingly committed from the supporting cast, but John C. Reilly steals the show as Taquito, a sickly homeless man who was abandoned at the mall when he was a child. Literally everything that came out of that man’s mouth during this movie had me busting out in laughter, no matter how sickening it could have been.

Will Forte plays Allen Bishopman, a vengeful sword salesman who plans to rat out the whereabouts of Tim and Eric to the Schlaaang corporation. Forte plays the role extremely well, offering up quite a bit of gut busting laughter whenever he’s on screen. In fact, most of the cast members of B$M have had recurring roles on “Awesome Show, Great Job!” so they’re extremely familiar with the often irreverent material of Tim and Eric.

Many fans have complained of the film’s rather linear storytelling, but I find it to be a blessing in disguise. At the end of the day, there’s a reason why episodes of “Awesome Show, Great Job!” are only 10 minutes long. Because, unlike Jackass, 95 minutes of oddball skits can get very old, very quickly, and B$M quickly finds a wonderful balance between what worked on the TV show, and what works in a feature film. In fact, I applaud Tim and Eric’s ability to create a feature film out of a premise that seems impossibly short-winded.

Fans and newbies alike will find something to love in Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie. Produced by Funny or Die pioneers Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, the film is an inviting introduction to the most lovable idiots since Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, but is also a faithful jump to the big screen for longtime fans. Granted, this movie isn’t for everybody, but if it is for you, you’ll be getting a nice dose of shrim in your life.

4.5/5 Grizzly’s

Trailer Roundup: Bourne Legacy, Resident Evil: Retribution, Iron Sky & More

The Bourne Legacy

Matt Damon gives up the ghost and new blood moves in to take over. Treadstone is back and they are offering the role of Jason Bourne to Aaron Cross, another assassin with baggage. Not much is known about the plot of the film, but I would wager it doesn’t follow the book at all, much like its predecessors…

Stars: Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, Edward Norton, Joan Allen, Albert Finney

Release Date: August 3rd, 2012

Continue reading Trailer Roundup: Bourne Legacy, Resident Evil: Retribution, Iron Sky & More

Grizzly Review: Rampart

It’s a dangerous assumption to say that good performances make good movies. True, they do enhance the experience of watching what could have otherwise been absolute trash, but unless a story is worth telling, the performances could be as amazing as you’d like, but they still won’t be enough to turn a bad movie good.

In 2009, Woody Harrelson was nominated for an Oscar for The Messenger, a story about a Casualty Notification Officer played by Ben Foster who becomes involved with a widow after telling her that her husband has died. Written and directed by Oren Movermen, the film garnered two Oscar nods, one for Harrelson’s performance, the other for the film’s screenplay. The Messenger is a great movie that showcases the talents of both its cast and its crew, making it fully deserving of its two nominations. Director Oren Movermen’s follow up film, Rampart, which also stars Woody Harrelson and Ben Foster, is a case of pretentious film-making at its worst.

Rampart follows officer David Douglas Brown, one of the last crooked cops on the force. After a criminal crashes his car into Brown’s squad vehicle, and attempting to flee the scene after assaulting Brown, he beats the man halfway to death in an act of self-defense. A hidden camera captures the entire ordeal on tape, and within hours, it’s on the news for everybody to see. The incident becomes a national issue, forcing Brown to re-evaluate his entire life and struggle to support his family during this rough time.

Both the plot and cast of Rampart make it seems like a surefire hit, but the film is bogged down by an aimless script, and often pointless direction by Oren Movermen that aims to enhance the imagery. Instead, it ends up distracting the viewer from the thin shreds of a story being told. Woody Harrelson is fantastic as promised, as is the rest of the cast, but everything else just…isn’t. I often found myself fighting to stay awake, staring at my clock, fidgeting, and constantly checking how long the film had been going for.

I’ve seen a lot of cop dramas in my day, and at first glance this seems like it might take a different turn, maybe even striving for a Bad Lieutenant cult status,  but it’s that dire need for acceptance in a world of gritty police dramas that drives Rampart‘s plot into the ground, then back up for air, then right back into the ground. Also, the casting of talented A-listers in almost every role gives the film a really fabricated feel that could have been completely erased had the casting directors gone for the “unknown and talented” actors. Still, by the time I had made it to critiquing the casting, I was already so sick of the damn thing I didn’t even care, not a good trait to have if you’re a movie of any genre.

1/5 Bears

Grizzly Review: Safe House

For years, Denzel Washington has created one of the best resumes in Hollywood by essentially just playing himself. Take a minute and think of the first five Denzel movies that come to mind. For me, it’s Training Day, John Q., Man on Fire, Glory, and American Gangster. If your list is in any way similar to mine, think about Denzel’s performances in all of those movies. Were it not for maybe the clothes he was wearing, or the setting of the scene, do you think you could even discern certain Denzel performances from others?

If you can, you must be really good at crosswords and “Where’s Waldo?” because I seriously can’t even begin to tell them apart. Still, I believe that that’s a big part of Denzel’s appeal. You know what to expect, and it works every time. If it worked the first 12 times, there’s a pretty big chance that it’s going to work a 13th time. In the newest vehicle for Denzel, Safe House, he plays Tobin Frost. In the mid 80s and up until the late 90s, Frost was one of the top CIA agents in the world. He went rouge in 2002 for unknown reasons, and has been on the run from the US government ever since.

Discovered in South Africa, Frost is placed in the care of Matt Weston, a young and optimistic CIA agent who has spent the last year working as a safe house operator, never able to see any real action. Frost is brought in by an extraction team led by Daniel Kiefer (Robert Patrick), but the location of the house is compromised, and with the extraction team dead, Weston is in charge of Frost’s whereabouts.

Back at his apartment, Weston has a beautiful French girlfriend with whom he is madly in love with, and vice versa. The obvious conflict with having a relationship in his line of work makes it extremely hard to explain to her what is going on among all of the commotion. The subplot of Weston’s lady friend makes for interesting character development later in the film when he must make the difficult choice between the safety of the woman he loves, and the strong feelings he has for her.

Stateside, orders from Catherine Linklater (Vera Farmiga), David Barlow (Brendan Gleeson), and Harlan Whitford (Sam Shepard), three of the agency’s executive officers, instruct Weston to successfully bring Frost out to a new safe house in rural South Africa. While trying to get to their location, Weston and Frost are being tracked by a group of men after a file that Frost has hidden. Inside the file is very valuable information that may just be the end of government secrecy as we know it.

Safe House is Denzel’s first film since 2010’s Unstoppable, his second train movie after The Taking of Pelham 123. Safe House is an extremely welcome return to form for Denzel, who turns in a fantastically familiar performance as Tobin Frost. Ryan Reynolds is also surprisingly effective as the up and coming CIA agent who just wants to do the right thing. Brendan Gleeson, Vera Farmiga, and Sam Shepard all do wonderfully in their supporting roles, but Gleeson really steals the show, as usual, playing yet another diverse character to add to his already eclectic resume.

The chemistry between Ryan Reynolds and Denzel Washington is dynamite. Their banter is often revealing, quick, and engrossing, serving as an equal to the heart-racing action sequences littered throughout the film. They both seem very comfortable in their characters, and even more comfortable with each other, which makes for some wonderfully tense and sometimes hilarious scenes between the two. I’d love to see them star in a comedy together with Ryan Reynolds leading the way instead of Denzel, because honestly, they make a great pair.

Directed by Daniel Espinosa, Safe House makes good use of the effective shaky cam style that has been popular for a few years now, editing together some stylish action sequences, as well as some tense dialogue that moves the film along at a very brisk pace, to say the least, because once the action starts, it doesn’t let up until the end credits roll, something that can’t be said for a lot of the other “action-packed” spy movies that have been released recently.

The fast paced but intelligent script by first time feature film screenwriter, David Guggenheim, manages to be action packed but also contains a considerable amount of character development as well as good enough dialogue that doesn’t distract from the movie’s serious tone. The biggest success in the screenplay, though, is its integration of culture to service its plot, including a breathtaking arena sequence that segways nicely into a display of South Africa’s slums, including a nice cameo performance by Ruben Blades.

All in all, Safe House is a thrilling ride that is better than it has any right to be, offering a slew of excellent performances, some great action, and a script that takes you on a wild ride through the mind of a traitor, as well as through South Africa’s best and worst. If you liked the trailer, you’ll love the movie, as the advertising doesn’t misrepresent the film like many other previews that we see on TV. Safe House, among many other things, is entirely predictable from the first scene, but that shouldn’t stop you from what is otherwise a thrilling ride at the movies.

4/5 Bears

Robert Rodriguez to Direct ‘Machete’ Sequel Entitled ‘Machete Kills’

In 2010, critics and audiences alike ooh’d and aah’d at Machete, a character Danny Trejo had been playing since 2001’s Spy Kids. Finally garnering his own movie, Machete was a definite success for writer/director Robert Rodriguez, who shot the film in the neo-grindhouse format that was made popular (again) by 2007’s Grindhouse, a collaborative double feature by Robert Rodriguez, who did the first film, Planet Terror, and Quentin Tarantino, who did the second film, Death Proof.

In between the movies were fake, or supposedly fake, previews of upcoming films, one of the films being Machete. Others included Hobo with a Shotgun, which has since been made into a film, as well as Don’t, Thanksgiving, and Werewolf Women of the SS. Reports of production for Thanksgiving, which is being directed by Hostel creator Eli Roth, were recently confirmed and is set to release sometime in either 2012 or 2013. The first spawn of the original Grindhouse, though, was Machete, and the sleeper hit of Spring 2010 is getting a sequel entitled Machete Kills.

Rodriguez is working with producer Alexander Rodnyansky from AR films, and the sequel is the first in a planned trilogy, with the hopes that Trejo will reprise his role for the upcoming two films. Rodriguez says, “The fan response to the Machete character has been fanatical since his first appearance…Machete is truly a super hero and Machete Kills will be bigger and more ambitious than the first time.” He also has hopes that the surviving characters of the first film will make the decision to return again for the next two sequels.

Kyle Ward has written the first draft of the script, which is set to be developed by Robert and Marcel Rodriguez. The film is a Quick Draw Production with production by Aaron Kaufman and Iliana Nikolic, and Sergei Bespalov and Rick Schwartz. Production is slated to begin in April of this year.

Not much is known about the plot thus far, but Deadline.com released a report stating: “The new film finds Machete recruited by the U.S. Government for a mission which would be impossible for any mortal man. Machete must battle his way through Mexico to take down a madman cartel leader and an eccentric billionaire arms dealer who has hatched a plan to spread war across the planet with a weapon in space. Machete takes on an army in an effort to dismantle a plan for global anarchy.”

If Machete Kills is anything like the original, count me in.